Category Archives: Tiny Threads

Stranger on the office elevator: “Why do you have to try so hard to dress better than the rest of us?”

Me: “Oh, I’m not trying.”

#TinyThreads

Some threads don’t deserve to be part of the tapestry we have going here, but who knows? Someday they may play a part. There is wisdom there, perhaps, or the golden rule of hoarding. Such fine lines, such tiny threads…

#TinyThreads

People who are relentlessly happy arouse suspicion in me.

#TinyThreads

Never mistake a bon-bon for a bon mot.

#TinyThreads

Very rarely does useful information follow the words ‘to be fair’.

#TinyThreads

Me to the co-worker who instantly started engaging me first thing in the morning: “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to start a conversation.”

#TinyThreads

Resting bitch face?

Please.

As long as I’m awake my game is fully active.

It’s called work ethic.

#TinyThreads

Something that continues to challenge me: gauging the number of napkins I’ll need for a take-out order. Woefully under or over, never a happy median.

#TinyThreads

The ‘S’ is for Super

And the ‘U’ is for Unique

The ‘P’ is for Perfection cause you know that we are freaks

The ‘E’ is for Exotic

And the ‘R’ is for Raps

So tell those nosy people just to stay the hell back!

#Supersonic

#TinyThreads

Scene of the next generation: parents driving their kids to the bus-stop and waiting with them. This is our state of the world thanks to murderers, child molesters and territorial turkeys. We are fucked.

#TinyThreads

Someone please explain the following saying to me: I can’t win for losing.

I mean, duh. Isn’t that the whole point? What am I missing?

#TinyThreads

Me: “I can fight! I’m scrappy.”

Co-worker: “You threw your back out taking a picture of a flower.”

#TinyThreads

Some concepts are better left as concepts.

Case in point: avocado fries.

#TinyThreads

Ah, the unicorn.

Mythical beast after my own heart.

And the rainbow.

Peace.

#TinyThreads