Category Archives: Tiny Threads

The days of three-way calling are long gone.

Still, I remember them with a smile.

Click twice.

#TinyThreads

Me, at work: “I think my hearing’s going. Thank God.”

#TinyThreads

Rarely does anything good come of a text thread with more than five people on it.

#WhittleMeThis

#TinyThreads

Are the people who have to write ‘TBH’ generally lying the rest of the time?

#TinyThreads

How is it that I can type a perfectly-spelled and perfectly-punctuated text message 200 characters long with my thumb on a screen the size of a walnut, but cannot fit one of these things back in the shelf unit in less than five tries? 

#TinyThreads 

Remember when your cassettes encountered something magnetic and the next time you played them you were a DJ bringing the volume up and down like the real thing?

#TinyThreads

In the immortal words of Miss Janet Jackson:

“Ain’t no acid in this house.”

#RhythmNation1814

#TinyThreads

How come only guys get caught with their zippers down? 

#TinyThreads

To give you an indication of how much I’ve aged, I decided I need a long-handled shoe horn to get dressed in the morning. I’ll pass it off as a component of dandyism, but it’s really just age. (Mine will be much fancier than the one pictured.)

#TinyThreads

I’m Wilhelmina Slater and I don’t get wet.

#TinyThreads

Thank God for online shopping.

I mean, really.

Thank you, God.

Hallelu.

#TinyThreads

A spiderweb of gold around my neck.

I think it’s time for a new necklace.

A bracelet will do too.

#TinyThreads

This year the role of ‘Drunk Gay Uncle’ will be played by Alan Bennett Ilagan.

[All season long – this is a recurring role. And he’s open to nudity in the service of a storyline.]

#TinyThreads

Have you started crocheting your winter blanket?

We should have started when the goldenrod appeared in August.

Still, it’s never too late.

#TinyThreads

National Song Lyric Day should be a holiday where we have to speak only in song lyrics.

If we took a holiday, everything would be ok.

Don’t tell me to stop.

Stop in the name of love.

One night in the name of love.

Who wrote the book of love?

Who’s Johnny?

Johnny Angel…

You must be an angel.

I believe that dreams come true.

Dream on.

The beat goes on.

#TinyThreads