Category Archives: General

Another month has gone ~ farewell October – and thus we begin the quick slide into the holiday season. Woe to those of us who are not ready – time stands still for no man. November has always been about mixed emotions. The definitive end to warm weather, the arrival of early evenings and the fast fall of darkness, and only a bit of Thanks near the finish.

The Parade of Hunks was kicked off by the magnificent Mr. Brooks.

It continued with a pair of J’s: Jack Walton and Julian Edelman.

Get your kilt off and take life by the balls.

If it’s bitter at the start then it’s sweeter in the end.

The Madonna Timeline returned, so come on and shine your heavenly body tonight.

Cosplay extraordinaire Michael Hamm hams it up and takes it off.

Halloween has always been my day off and this year proved no exception.

The Sex Factor of Drew Chadwick, the ghostly goodness of Casper Van Dien, and the frank hotness of Kevin McDaid.

When October goes…

… and November arrives.

Stone Cold Steve Austin has a warm heart.

Are you just being kind?

When October goes… well, it’s too late for when, as it’s already gone. In its place is November. In many ways, it is one of the cruelest months, portending the winter to come, but somewhat mollified by the arrival of Thanksgiving and the holiday season. Before that, though, the leaves must be ripped from the trees. This month marks the arrival of early nights and gray days, cold rains and colder winds. I’m not sure I’m ready for that, but there’s no choice.

One last look at what has come before, as seen in these photos, showing the spectacular foliage on a venerable maple tree. This year the trees held onto their carriage longer than usual, and for that I’m grateful. We’ve also been granted a spell of warmer days in the past month that has eased the shift deeper into fall. Of late, however, the customary rains of the season have returned, and with them the cooler temperatures. Another November is upon us. The month of gray is also the month of gratitude.

Halloween is my day off. When you’ve spent a lifetime wearing outlandish outfits on a regular basis, there’s no big thrill in doing it when everyone is trying to do the same. Let the amateurs have their hour, I say. (Don a cape at Price Chopper on a Tuesday afternoon in September then come talk to me.) That said, I once enjoyed this quasi-holiday as much as the next kid, and there were a number of notable costumes I wore that I recall to this very day.

As a younger child, I was very much into animals. Not in any twisted or sick bestiality type of way, but in a pure, innocent, adoring manner. I was a beaver one year (go ahead and make the joke, I’ll wait), a skunk another, and even a cheetah (probably my favorite, as it meant I got to wear a suit made entirely of leopard print).

As I got older, I grew out of the animal phase and into something, well, older. I was an old man one year (something I could do without much make-up today), and a devil the next (even less of a stretch). After that run, I was old enough to not care so much, and when I had to march in Halloween parades as part of the band, it lost all appeal, so I’d go to a stand-by cape and hat and call it a night. (Still my M.O. if I need to do anything on this evening.)

Today, I’m going to let the rest of you take center stage and shine with your elaborate get-ups, sexy/slutty/skin-baring strip-downs, and witty sight-gag ensembles. I’ll sit back and watch, enjoying the spectacle from afar. (Besides, I’ve got badder fish to fry and other outfits to plan for evenings far more important than tonight.)

On the eve before All Hallow’s Eve, the Hunk of the Day honor goes fittingly to shape-shifter and cosplayer extraordinaire Michael Hamm. Every now and then I think that if I’d had some sort of cosplay outlet as a kid, I wouldn’t be such a fucked-up adult – then I realize that we did have cosplay back then: it was called ‘Underoos.’ Thankfully, it’s here now as well, and if you’ve ever been to Comic-Con or one of the cosplay conventions, it’s a surreal, magical experience. Just the sort of escapism and fantasy we like to celebrate on this blog.

Mr. Hamm has an extensive arsenal of cosplay looks, and the body to back them all up. More importantly, he’s got a sense of humor, shot through with a wicked wit, and an endearingly self-deprecating attitude that makes him practically perfect. (Additional credit must also be given to Shaun Simpson, the photographer who so often manages to capture Mr. Hamm at his finest, including most of the photos seen here.)

Before I was a cosplayer, I was a fan artist. I would draw my favorite characters and sell the pieces at art auctions. But once I discovered cosplay, it was like, ‘I don’t have to draw my favorite characters, I can become my favorite characters. ~ Yaya Han

The week of Halloween dawns in cool, gray, rainy form, perfect for fall and fine for keeping rowdy costumed kids at bay. The last few days on the blog have found me in catch-up form, and we’re sell not up-to-date, but I like that. By the time this place gives hint as to where I am, I’ll already be gone. Better for would-be-burglars, and safer for safety purposes. Ho-hum, I’m boring myself… on with the weekly recap.

It was the anniversary of Madonna’s ‘Erotica’ album. I’ll give you love, I’ll hit you like a truck, I’ll give you love, I’ll teach you how to…

There was a rare second-crowning of a Hunk of the Day, with this post on Lance Parker.

It’s never too early for a Christmas gift wish list for those who like to plan ahead.

One of the more popular Hunks of the Day has got to be Philip Fusco, who will likely receive his double-crowning any day now.

There’s nothing more inspiring than an artist who is also a gentleman. Unless he is also a Hunk like THomas Wolski.

This was also the week that I finally chronicled our Columbus Day weekend in Ogunquit, such as it was. It began so well, but quickly crashed as my back went down. All because of a few flowers.

There was a last bit of beauty, though, to salvage all in a moment by the sea.

Believe it or not, it’s not always about Madonna and men.

Although, Nick Jonas got all shirtless again, talking bulges and sex scenes and further endearing himself to the gay community, so maybe it is about the men.

Aside from the Hunk of the Day and Madonna, the content of this blog is as variable as Renee Zellweger’s face. If you’re looking for consistency, look elsewhere. If you’re looking for the tried and true, try somewhere different. But if you’re looking for something that holds the possibility of the unexpected, even in this late day of my life (when I just discovered I need bifocals) get on board and hold on tight.

We are multifaceted creatures, layered like the proverbial rings of an onion. We do not lend ourselves to such convenient categorization, at least I don’t. One of the chief criticisms of this blog is that it veers so wildly between topics as varied as my affection for my niece and nephew to the dare-to-bare antics of shirtless (and often pants-less) men. As if to be a doting Uncle precluded being anything other. As if it wasn’t possible to appreciate the beauty of the naked human form and the floral form simultaneously. As if we were bound to be one thing and one thing only. Pish posh on such nonsense. Who can afford to be so limited? And who would want to be? If you’re that one-dimensional and narrow-minded, this is not the place for you, and you will find nothing but infuriation here. (And chances are I’ll thrill in giving it to you, because sometimes I’m just an insufferable prick.)

Anyway, the point of this post is to highlight a few off-the-beaten-path posts that hopefully show off the fact that this blog is more than just Madonna and men. Two very important topics, of course, but it’s good to get a little variety in your online diet. With that said, a sampling of the winding valley farm this story has become:

A letter to my niece and nephew. 

A smoke to be made sacred.

A wish on the moon.

A failure of narcissism.

A toothpick in the rain.

A stalker’s summer scene.

A pot to piss in.

A necessary evil.

A suitcase of scarves.

A pearl necklace.

A lesson learned.

A poem remembered.

A WalMart midnight.

A few shelves…

And a cozy va-jay-jay.

As the sun descended, so did the temperature, and at the same time the winds kicked up. It made for a very cool evening, but we huddled to the fire pits (some of us all but mounted the heat lamps) and in the end everyone was having such a good time that the cold was almost forgotten. Seeing the happiness on the faces of Chris and Darcey, it was impossible not to be warmed by the evening.

The bride was good enough to pose for this fur-necked photo, visible proof of the tempestuous wind, and the undampened enthusiasm of the night. She would prove far braver than me a little later.

Weddings are often a chance to get back in touch with those we love. In this case, the Collegetown Crew from Cornell was almost entirely intact. (Kristen had been there earlier for the ceremony.) Now, twenty years later, here they were, together again. It made me want to plan a reunion for next summer.

As all our get-togethers inevitably do, this one wound down to a couple of Princess Leia buns and the opportunity to go completely crazy. Despite the chilly temps and the ferocious wind, people had started jumping in the pool (which was kept to a warm 85 degrees). I didn’t dare, but I did provide a shot or two for those brave souls who did. My last moments of Best Man servitude.

At last, after a day of holding elegant court, the bride and groom were ready to let loose and jump in. It was a happy ending to a happy day. Congrats Chris and Darcey!

It’s not usually a good thing when the bride ends up in a pool in her wedding dress, but in this case it was nothing short of awesome. My friend Chris is not your usual groom (it takes a strange bird to pick me as the Best Man) and his betrothed Darcey is way too cool to be anything like your basic bride, so when she jumped into the pool at the end of the evening – in her leopard-print wedding dress – it capped off one of the coolest weddings I’ve attended.

The bride and groom walked down the makeshift aisle together, holding their newborn son Simon. That set the wonderfully non-traditional tone of the celebration. From there, a few couples spoke about what marriage meant to them, while giving some marital advice to the newlyweds. There were no readings or scripture or drawn-out religious practices – and in their place were practical, moving, loving words spoken by those who meant the most to the couple.

Following the ceremony, we moved up to the rooftop, where a large pool glittered in the afternoon sun. There was a breeze kicking in, but as long as there was no rain we were fine.

The groom waited until the last minute before selecting his outfit. I could never. This Ted Baker suit was purchased months ago, a subtle gray so as not to upstage anyone. See, I know my place.

This was a wedding that brought a lot of wonderful people together again. Some of these folks I haven’t seen in almost twenty years – that’s a lot of time under the bridge. Some of them, like the ones below, I saw the day before. The important part is that we were all together again.

Suzie and the Tom-Ford-scented scarf – a last-minute purchase made the day of the wedding when I saw how cool the temperatures were headed…

It’s kind of like the last time you have sex with an ex: you don’t really know it’s the last time until afterward. The same goes for the last swim of the season. In this case, I thought this day was going to be the last day – only it turn out there would be one more. Now, at the time of this writing in October, I can say with certainty that the last time in the pool was the last time in the pool for this year.

Luckily (or unluckily) for you there was documentation of the days in question, and for this first part here’s the sunny day I thought would be the last but wasn’t.

(There’s a lot more male nudity in Part II, so come back this afternoon…)