Author Archives: Alan Ilagan

A Covenant in the Sky

Continuing our Summer of the Rainbow, this full beauty appeared while I was looking for post-its at Staples of all places. Such is the state of the office worker these days. How brick and mortar stores manage to stay afloat is beyond me, and given the conditions and supplies of the store at hand, it may not be long for this retail life. I digress, and from the main point of this post, which was this gorgeous and complete rainbow that spanned the entire sky before me. Parking lots always work best when trying to capture rainbows on camera, but even the best timing and opportunities seldom give the full picture as seen here. There are usually only bits and pieces of it – one of the ends or the middle – so this was a rare gift the universe bestows every few years. I’m taking it as a fond farewell to the wonderful summer we’ve had – one that will find a full recap in a pair of posts that go up tomorrow. Come back for that celebration.

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A Regal Return of Hope

The monarch butterly was recently added to the list of endangered species, thanks to so much of its native habitat being destroyed. Humans will never be as noble as this magnificent creature, and my heart hurts at the idea that their numbers are dwindling. I left a stalk of milkweed alone in the garden (where it really didn’t belong) in a sad attempt at making the area more hospitable to these regal beauties. Alas, it preferred the flashier butterfly bush, where it paused to pose for a few pictures. 

In keeping with the dire news of their declining numbers, this was the first monarch we’ve seen all summer. We used to have many fluttering about the lofty stalks of the cup plant and aforementioned butterfly bush – this year there was only this one. But one is better than none, and a single being is enough to give the smallest sliver of hope to see us through the winter. 

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Petunias Fluttering in the Rain-Wind

Standing in the garage, I watch the rain pour down over the driveway and feel a sense of calm. The scent it sends up where hot driveway meets cooling rain is one of those intoxicating perfumes that rivals anything that might be conjured from the linden tree, or even the lilacs of late spring. While I am leaning into the scene, and feeling a profound sense of gratitude for the rain on this humid, sticky day, I recall the petunias in the backyard, the ones that are likely drooping in the rain. They retained such a sense of freshness just that morning, and I remember thinking how lovely it was that they were still putting forth blooms, even when we had mostly moved indoors for the scant remainder of the season. 

It was a banner year for the return of the petunia, something I shall put into play again next summer, even if my heart knows it won’t be the same. This was a magical time. Watching the rain fall down, I inhaled the beauty of it all – the idea of summer flowers closing their show for the year, and the idea of rain nourishing them until the very end. A little flare of fall flutters on each falling raindrop, tiny sparks of light that will soon ignite a whole new season. For now, it’s just rain – calming and soothing rain. 

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A Last Weekly Recap of this Summer

The big summer recap posts arrive later, on the last day of summer, but for now we do our Monday morning quarterbacking with this weekly recap. Our last full week of summer – how did we ever end up here? It went way too quickly, and now we are looking back, at all of it…

Finding joy in the arrival of autumn.

Summer flare through a deluge.

Bejeweled by rain.

The last swim of 2022? (It’s looking more and more like it.)

Who doesn’t love a late-summer surprise?

The inner dialogue running rampant.

Pausing on the day of rest.

A gratuitously-shirtless post on the Sabbath.

Dazzlers of the Day included Ron Zacchi, Rosie O’Donnell, Maya Penn, Matthew Rettenmund, Ronen Rubinstein and Theo Ford.

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Dazzler of the Day: Theo Ford

Sailing on with our shirtless Sunday shenanigans, this Dazzler of the Day is none other than actor, designer and writer Theo Ford. He’s a social media sensation thanks to his robust collection of Twitter and Instagram followers, and content that highlights his piercing blue eyes. He’s traveled the world, sharing sensational photos of his adventures, and taking us all along on his spectacular journey. (He’s also Dad to a darling dog named Apollo, who has their own Instagram here.)

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Shirtless on the Sabbath

It’s been quite a while since we’ve had a proper gratuitous shirtless post in these parts, and before summer leaves, let’s celebrate the shirtless male form with these celebrities doffing their clothes. First up, with two pictures that still can’t quite contain his musculature, is Henry Cavill, who’s been seen shirtlessly here and here and here

Nicholas Hoult appeared in even less clothing in this gratuitously-naked post, and also made a cheeky appearance in this collection of nude dudes.  

He may not be on ‘Bridgerton’ anymore, but the memory of Regé-Jean Page and his multiple nude scenes lives on, such as in this Dazzler of the Day post

Tom Daley has been so popular here that he has his own category, a la Madonna and Tom Ford. In post after post after post, he’s gotten into a Speedo, almost out of a Speedo, and all sorts of glory in-between

The perpetual beach shots of a shirtless Shawn Mendes should never stop coming. Mendes has an extensive shirtless history here, especially in underwear posts like this and this and this

Simu Liu was a Dazzler of the Day here, thanks to his entrance to the Marvel Universe. He manages to look even better in the pool universe. 

Going the extra mile and bringing up the rear of this post is Charlie Puth, who’s been thirst-trapping hapless admirers of the male form on social media for years. This fully-naked Charlie Puth shot is a fitting end to this Sunday stretch of shirtlessness.

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Pausing on This Day of Rest

This is the week that summer ends and fall begins, and after completing the summer recap posts, and making inroads with the few new fall posts (including a revamped look for this space) I find myself thoroughly exhausted and spent. Do you know how many words I actually write every single week for this blog? Copy and paste them somewhere and let me know. I’m sure it’s a lot – and this isn’t even my day job. 

Luckily, it’s a labor of love, and as I’ve kept my writing largely to the realm of joy and self-expression, I don’t have to worry about deadlines or perfection or word-count limits. That goes for minimum counts as well, and so I shall end this brief Sunday morning post with the promise of some fiery new content coming within the next few days. ALANLAGAN.com is about to be LIT.

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The Inner Dialogue Running Rampant

Most of us have an inner dialogue, that little voice we hear which expresses everything we are too shy or scared or smart enough not to say out loud. (I say ‘most’ because there are reportedly some people who do not have such a thing, which is marvelously unfathomable to me.) That inner dialogue can often wreak havoc, especially when it gets out of hand, which it sometimes does for me. Mostly these conversations in my head happen in the evening, as I’m mentally remembering the day. Sometimes it’s just a case of replaying a moment and coming up with something much more brilliant than what I came up with then, a wittier comeback to something someone said; more often it’s a kinder and softer response to something more cutting that came out of my mouth. Virgos run the risk of overanalyzing and being overcritical, so this inner voice is the bane of my existence, because it cuts me as much as it cuts those around me. 

Whenever I find myself getting bogged down in these dialogues, I try to calmly recenter myself, taking in a few deep breaths, and stabilizing myself by simply being present. Pausing to look around at whatever might be near, I pick apart little details to distract the mind before it heads off to the races. A smudge on the windowpane of the front door. A wrinkle in the silk curtain framing the window. The gentle drone of some faraway lawnmower, perhaps executing the final few passes it will make over the grass this year. I will tune into my body – the slight itch of a recent vaccine in my arm, the cold toes of an exposed foot, and the breath which I make deeper and slower and calmer. 

This is how I calm the voices in my head. This is how to gain control of the inner narrative. This is how mindfulness manifests itself

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Dazzler of the Day: Ronen Rubinstein, Again

When one of your Instagram posts gets flagged and removed for nudity, I know you’re one of my tribe. That was more than enough for Ronen Rubinstein to get his second Dazzler of the Day, thanks to the nude sauna pic you see below. (His first crowning can be seen here.) Of course, Rubinstein was already on my radar for being so dazzling in so many other realms, such as his environmental activism, and the fact that he’s been acting, directing, producing and writing since he was a teenager. Check out his other work in ‘American Horror Stories’, ‘9-1-1: Lone Star’, ‘Orange is the New Black‘ and ‘Dead of Summer’. 

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Late Summer Surprise

Summer saves some of its sunniest surprises for the very end, such as these coreopsis blooms. Earlier in the season I’d planted a coreopsis – a tall variety native to this country – hoping it would be an easy fill for a tricky spot that wasn’t easily-accessible by hose. Then this summer hit – a summer with heat and sun and unrelenting rain-free glory – and even this hardy coreopsis saw fit to droop and wilt and, I assumed, expire. Its leaves fell off, and the spindly stems soon disappeared behind the ever-robust and pushy Northern sea oats. I forgot all about its promised yellow blooms. 

A few days ago, after a few storms had taken the killer heat away, I saw this pair of bright yellow blooms from across the yard. The coreopsis had survived after all, and was giving us this final show before the clock ticked to fall. Best of all, there were a few more buds – a promise that there was more beauty yet to unfold. 

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Dazzler of the Day: Matthew Rettenmund

The world’s pre-eminent source of Madonna knowledge and wisdom, Matthew Rettenmund is releasing an updated edition of his epic ‘Encyclopedia Madonnica’ and for that reason, among many more, he is our Dazzler of the Day (a long overdue honor). My adoration for Matthew goes back almost as far back as my love for Madonna, and so intertwined are they in my fan/stan mind, any time he does something related to her gives me a genuine thrill. (The Madonna entries on his BoyCulture website are often his strongest, and definitely some of my favorites.) 

The last update he did on Madonna was a bodacious exercise in inspiration – and the results were an art book second only perhaps to a certain tome named ‘Sex’. While I won’t be promoting the new version with my ass like I did last time, here’s the info on the brilliant revision direct from the author himself:

“Encyclopedia Madonnica” by Matthew Rettenmund
Cover design: Anthony Coombs
Cover image: © Andrew Caulfield / AUGUST / augustimage.com — 1984 “Borderline” video “Gloss” session — UNSEEN UNTIL THIS MOMENT
Inside: 674 pp, updated entry-by-entry through 9/1/22, includes new interviews (Liz Rosenberg’s first Madonna-centric Q&A in 30 years, Susan Seidelman with screen grabs from “Desperately Seeking Susan” auditions, many more)
Retail: $90 — up on Amazon now.

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The Last Swim of 2022?

I’m not at all confident that this will be the last time I go for a swim this year, but it’s a definite possibility, and rather than look back a few weeks from now and wish I’d made more of it, I dove into the water determined to make a memory. The air above the water was chilly – the first notably cool day we’ve had in months – but the sun was out, still cutting through the wind that was suddenly picking up. 

On the water, little white blossoms from the seven sons flower tree floated across the surface, and occasionally the perfume from the flowers still dangling above the pool carried on the breeze. All these vestiges of summer should have been a comfort, a sign that bits of the sunny season were lingering until the very end, but mostly it just felt a little sadder being this near the close of the season. We are less than a week away from the arrival of fall. 

It will be sad to see this summer slip into the past, so sunny and warm and glorious was it, but most of me is ready. Too much of a good thing has rarely been a good thing. Nature knows how to pace herself, and I trust in the seasonal time-table she has put in place. I know a number of people who would love for it stay perpetually summer, the way the sun sticks around year-round in places like Southern California – and there are moments when I think that would be lovely, but those moments are almost always at the tail-end of winter, just as the wondrous cycle of spring is about to begin. 

Right now, the idea of nine more months of summer feels stale and stagnant, and I’m ok with turning to the next seasonal page. After this one last dip… 

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Dazzler of the Day: Maya Penn

When you start your company at the age of eight, you’ve already accomplished more than most of us ever will, and such is the reason why Dazzler of the Day is likely the very smallest honor that will mark Maya Penn’s already-illustrious career. An artist, animator, entrepreneur, environmentalist, philanthropist, and the CEO of ‘Maya’s Ideas’, Penn has also given three TED talks. Check out her enchanting website here, and witness the crux of stylish sustainability and compelling inspiration. 

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Bejeweled by Rain

Rejuvenating our hydrangeas (which had not been enjoying the heat and sun of this past summer) our recent run of rain has lended a fresh restart to the summer-beleaguered garden. The lawn is looking lush and tall, the fat leaves actually flopping over with their fullness, and the ferns have actually held their color. It’s as if summer is determined to shine beautifully until fall absolutely insists on her exit. 

Amid the madness of Mercury in retrograde, this pretty scene of post-storm beauty is a welcome reminder to pause and take in the moment. Under the rain, I’ve been hurrying by these plants without hesitating, and I’ve been missing this show. I need to remember that it’s ok to get a little wet. It’s just water, and there isn’t much left of summer. 

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Dazzler of the Day: Rosie Freakin’ O’Donnell

Currently ensconced in a social media renaissance thanks to her frank, funny, and often-enlightening Tik Tok posts, Rosie O’Donnell is one of those trailblazing entertainers who have managed to make a lifelong career in an industry that churns out and chews up even the most talented luminaries. She’s conquered television, Broadway, film, and talk shows with very few flops or foibles. She’s still a riveting on-screen presence, and her acting has never quite gotten the accolades it deserves – witness her current no-nonsense turn on the reboot series of ‘American Gigolo’. That said, it is when O’Donnell is just being her unabashed self that she truly shines. Follow her on Twitter or Tok Tok to see her in all her freaking hilarity. This marks her debut as Dazzler of the Day, yet another jewel in her luminescent crown. 

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