Family Vacation

Every summer our parents would take us on a family vacation. These were usually about a week in duration (it was the most my Dad would take off from work) but they seemed much longer, in the way that childhood has of stretching out time, especially during spells of grand adventure. We’d pack up the big station wagon, load a cooler with ice and sandwiches and soda (a treat, as we never got to drink much soda as kids) and head out on a carefully-plotted excursion. Sometimes we went South – to Florida or South Carolina – and sometimes we’d head North – to Montreal or Toronto. It didn’t really matter to us – we just loved the thrill of getting out of town for a while, and the excitement of hotel stays and new places to see.

For one of these vacations, a friend of my Mom gave her a journal to keep track of everything we did. She made a few entries before this final one:

The kids are miserable.

Emil – generally miserable.

Me – wondering why the hell I plan these vacations…

Looking back, we laugh at it. At the time, I’m sure there was hell to pay. Now, as we are about to embark on our first family vacation in over two decades, I hope the twins don’t volley my karma back at me. We’ll be on the Cape, where a couple of four-year-olds can get very tiresome if there’s not fun and sun and a lot to do. Wish me luck.

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A Word on Dance Recitals

Can we talk about dance recitals for a moment? Not in a politically-correct and kind way, but in a blunt, honest, hard-truth kind of way? I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings, but some things need to be said. I just attended my first, and very possibly last, dance recital for my four-year-old niece. Let me say upfront that she was great – I have to say that as her Uncle, and as someone who loves her dearly. She executed her dances well – all two that were in the early part of the program – and finished in relative unison in the finale. It was the intervening couple of hours that had me questioning my sanity, and the very existence of humanity.

First of all, two and a half hours is a long time for any production – but I’ve been told that this is relatively short for this sort of thing. All I can say to that is that if I have to sit through a recital longer than this, I’m taking a hostage or calling in a bomb threat. Either way, there will be people thanking me for it.

Second, there’s a rule against leaving once the kids you are there to see are finished, right? I’m certain that this is a rule, or at least polite protocol. I’m also guessing that this is why every single person, no matter how briefly or how early they appear in the program, is in the final number. As Madonna once remarked, “That’s one of life’s little fuck-overs.”

By the time we reached the Justin Bieber medley, my patience was tried, my brain was fried, but I still hadn’t died. FaceBook friends had told me to pray for death at the start but I didn’t listen. Now it was too late, and no one was going to smite me.

And yet… and yet… watching my little niece doing her toe taps and singing the final song of the evening, I was almost moved to forgive all that came before. Almost.

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The Sparkling Personalities of Gay Pride Albany

You know we live in topsy-turvy times when Andy’s yellow pants trump my greatest sequin efforts, but that’s exactly the reaction we got from those who know us best. Of course, I made a valiant effort and good showing even if his buttercup butt stole the day. I’m ok with that, as long as he doesn’t make it a regular occurrence. (And I’ve got a few tricks in my closet that should insure it won’t be.)

This year Albany’s Gay Pride Parade and Festival took place on a nearly perfect day. Usually, this day is sweltering hot or pouring rain. We lucked out for once, and the sequins could shine in all their glory – especially when given a double-jolt by my brilliant Sparkle Queen counterpoint, the ever-fabulous Duchess Ivanna.

Bea Arthur at her solid-gold-dancer’s-mother finest couldn’t hold a candle to the two of us, even if she was trying to bag a priest. Looks like this lady got the sequin memo too.

The day brought out some of my favorite people in Albany – old and new friends alike – as seen in this contingent of happy faces from the Capital Pride Center.

The HomoRadio crew was headed up by Sean and Ulysses.

I have mercifully cropped out the shoes of this otherwise-beautiful shot with Brenda and Marline (you’re welcome).

The ladies and gentlemen of the Rocks float, waving to the adoring throngs.

It was also a day of meeting FaceBook friends like Jai in person for the first time. (And I daresay he may have managed to out-sassy me in this pose – no mean feat.)

Oh look, it’s Oh Bar!

On our way out, we ran into two very dear friends we’ve known for over thirteen years ~ Bob and Jeff.

It was the perfect end to a perfect day of Pride.

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All That Glitters: A Gay Pride Outfit

It seems like this past week has been about one outfit after another in a quick-change game of outrageous wardrobe switch-ups, culminating with the featured sparkling ensemble you see before you now. This year’s Gay Pride outfit came together rather haphazardly. Unsure of which route to take ~ sequins or leopard ~ I posed the question to FaceBook and Twitter and the results were overwhelmingly in favor of sequins, with most people citing leopard’s hey-day of last year (to which I beg to differ – leopard is timeless).

In a twist veering from my modus operandi, I went with popular opinion (and what was already halfway in my wardrobe) so I purchased this pair of sequin shorts, rustled up a sequin top that had been in my attic closet for ten years, and paired it with a Deborah Harry tank top and pink necklace. The flip flops were simply a case of function over form, and an anticipated soggy field through which I’d be walking – plus I liked their color clash with the pink of Debbie’s top. A pair of aviators rounded out the insanity, because they forgive a lot of questionable shit.

I am so ready to slip into a pair of comfortable board shorts for the rest of the summer. Or nothing at all – so be prepared.

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Gratuitous Harry Judd GIFs

Harry Judd has long been a favorite in these parts ~ his body, his face, and his accent ~ and now these GIFs that capture the man in snippets of motion cement that favored status. He’s rightfully been named a Hunk of the Day (not once, but twice), taken his pants off for Attitude magazine, and then taken everything off. Because a naked Harry Judd is better than any other kind.

 

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A Recap Right Before the Summer Begins

It’s been a whirlwind of non-stop fun, and work, for the past few weeks, especially this last one, and a bit of exhaustion has finally caught up with me. Let me try to catch my breath and recap some of the events, before we slow down a bit.

Suzie celebrated her birthday – I won’t name which one, even if she wouldn’t mind, as mine is just a couple months away. Her Mom also got some well-deserved accolades with a New York State Liberty Medal.

I got behind the wheel of a Pontiac GTO, but didn’t really go anywhere. These two, however, did.

There were a few evenings of family fun, including this one celebrating a pre-school graduation.

It was a week of Pride, and all the accompanying outfits, highlights of which included the GLSEN Formal Affaire with its ‘Breakfast at Tiffany’s’ theme.

A return trip to NYC was made for this amazing production of ‘Here Lies Love’ – a musical about Imelda Marcos and the Philippines – and a reunion with Suzie and Chris.

The Hunks were on display as always, including Ryan Phillippe, Malachi Marx, Ayden Callaghan, Jose Llana and several DILFs.

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The DILF Post

On this Father’s Day, let’s look back at some of those daddies who were featured in a very different capacity as Hunks of the Day here. Does Fatherhood add or detract from a guy’s appeal? I’m not going to give my politically incorrect answer (Fathers and sex have no business being together outside of the Catholic church) but here are a few to get you shouting ‘Oh Daddy!’

First up is Matt Bomer, who has shown us that you don’t have to be straight to be a good father – a lesson that Neil Patrick Harris also gave, fathering twins no less.

Relatively new to being a baby daddy, Channing Tatum was much better known for other things. Stripping, modeling, and going butt-to-butt with Joe Manganiello.

He’s not quite there yet (pop it out Mila!) but Ashton Kutcher is about to become a father, and it looks like he’s ready.

Thanks to Reese, Ryan Phillippe became a Daddy a while back, but he remains in fighting form as evidenced here.

A tree-trimming father who didn’t bother to put his pants on for the holiday festivities, this is Mario Lopez.

Giving off that sexy Mr. Clean vibe and displaying his prowess with a tool belt, Chip Wade is an HGTV father.

I don’t know what kind of physical gifts the offspring of Ed Burns and Christy Turlington were bestowed, but I’m guessing they’re major.

Shakira’s Baby Daddy Gerard Pique.

Jamie Foxx will often bring one of his kids to red carpet events, which is a very cool thing.

The bromance between Matt Damon and Ben Affleck did not result in any children – they got them by other means.

Sometimes Dads can be kind of slutty. Case in point Eddie Cibrian.

His own kids are becoming stars in their own right, but they wouldn’t be around at all if it wasn’t for Will Smith.

Last but not least, a pair of daddies who own the term DILF: Ben Cohen and David Beckham.

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Shoes by John Fluevog, and a Jacket to Match

Back in the 90’s, Suzie took me to John Fluevog on Newbury Street. Back then, she was the one who bought a pair, but I filed the name and the company away for a bit, until I purchased my first pair a few months later. I still have that pair, and it remains one of my favorites. I almost wore them out, so now I save them for special occasions. It wasn’t until this past year that I returned to the store on Newbury Street, and bought the gorgeous pair you see before you now.

I waited a couple of months before showing them off, but for the GLSEN ‘Breakfast at Tiffany’s Formal Affaire’ it was time. There’s something about a new pair of shoes, especially quirky ones like these, that lifts the spirit.

The only question was: what kind of outfit could possibly hold up against such brilliance?

I think I found it.

As for the GLSEN event, it was a stunning success, and a ton of fun, thanks to the good folks behind it, especially Rick Marchant and Lisa Keller Weis – who worked their asses off to make it such a great night.

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Happy Dad’s Day

This goes out to all the Fathers in the world (and out of it) – but especially to my Dad, who raised and supported us – and continues to do so. My brother and I were a handful, and we tried his patience more than we should have, and more than he deserved, but he never wavered in his love for us. If it wasn’t always the most demonstrated, we always knew it was there, in a few quick words of support, a laugh at our antics, or the way he talked about us to other people. That’s where real love gets shown. Happy Father’s Day, Dad.

And to the other father in our family – my brother – a very Happy Father’s Day too!

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Almost Summer in the Boston Public Garden

Just because I’m not there in person doesn’t mean I’m not there in spirit.

Happy Pride, Boston.

You are beautiful.

Now and always.

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Happy Pride Albany! (And Boston!)

For someone so supposedly egotistical, it may seem strange that I’ve never been the biggest pusher when it comes to Gay Pride. I’ll put on the leopard and sequins (which in my case is not so much a stereotypical gay pride thing as much as just another outfit I’ve worn to the supermarket) and I’ll watch the parade and often shed a tear or two at how moving certain parts are, but for the most part I don’t feel the need to put on a show about it. I display my pride every day of the year that I live openly as a gay man. That takes more integrity and courage than waving a rainbow flag around on the one day it’s suddenly ok for everyone to be gay.

That said, I won’t ever deny the importance of the day and the significance of its history. This is more than just an excuse to dress up and revel in our pride – it’s a day to remember where we came from, and how just a few short years ago we didn’t have as much as we have now. It’s also an inspiration for how far we still need to go. As long as there are hate crimes, as long as there is homophobia, and as long as we don’t have marriage equality throughout the world, there will always be a reason for celebrating Pride.

 

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Tonight, We Breakfast

Advance word on Fifth Avenue is that attendance at the ‘Breakfast at Tiffany’s Formal Evening Affaire‘ as put on by GLSEN is at near-capacity, which means that tonight’s party will be hopping with the best and brightest of Albany’s sweet and elite. As soon as I finish work, I’ll be making a mad-dash home to primp and preen for the event, which begins at 5:30PM, making it the prime jumping-off point for a weekend of Pride parties and the big parade.

Please join us at the Washington Park Lake House, where the black tie is formal and the feather boas are always encouraged…

“It’s better to look at the sky than live there. Such an empty place; so vague. Just a country where the thunder goes and things disappear.”

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Is It A Sin To Love Too Much? ‘Here Lies Love’ Review

We love to see our idols fall. It’s an infuriating aspect of human nature that we somehow enjoy their pain as much as their pleasure. Before we can revel in them at their lowest, however, we must first raise them up. That supersonic trajectory and its subsequent plummet, forms the powerful pumping heart of ‘Here Lies Love’, a musical that sings the story of Imelda Marcos, notorious First Lady of the Philippines.

Like its complex heroine and the country in which it’s set, ‘Here Lies Love’ is brash, brilliant, and over-the-top in all the right ways. It personifies the Philippines in ways subtle and overt, with its strange juxtaposition of Catholicism, hedonism, treachery, honor, and, yes, love. As a Filipino myself, I’ve always maintained that we’re a crazy, fun-loving culture, filled with a riotous mash of squalor, beauty, violence, peace, laughter and tears. In other words, it’s just like any other country, with the drama racked up a few notches, all backed by a cheesy dance track. Having visited the Philippines a number of years ago, I can also vouch for the fact that the Filipinos love their karaoke, and take it rather seriously. (In fact, someone was literally shot when their rendition of ‘My Way’ was not up to par. True story.) That’s the kind of atmosphere that makes ‘Here Lies Love’ such a perfect personification of the Philippines and its most famous First Lady.

“Is it a sin to love too much?” Imelda asks as a young girl. She is just a teenager, making googly eyes at a white-suited Ninoy Aquino (a twist to the story that I originally found too good to be true, but after researching it, it appears based in fact) who rejects her for being too tall for his burgeoning political career. Following that she finds her way to the charismatic Ferdinand Marcos, who is leading his own campaign to become President, and she is swept off her feet into a politically-charged world of power, glamour, and burgeoning corruption.

The music of David Byrne and Fatboy Slim, which originally spear-headed this production in the form of a concept album, is the perfect disco-infused impetus to drive a Filipino tale like this. Don’t let those disco touches dissuade you from giving props to the tunes: these are solid songs, grounded with some gorgeous melodies and performed by some spectacular voices.

Ruthie Ann Miles brings the voice and the looks to the former beauty-queen, and an uncanny resemblance to Imelda (those sky-high shoulders and that bulbous chignon certainly aid in the magic), but more compelling than all of that is the way she crafts the arc of her character’s journey from innocence and passion to calculation and cruelty, never losing an ounce of the complexity and vulnerability of a woman caught up in her own myth, trying to hang onto her husband, and herself.

As the seductive dictator, Jose Llana brings political charisma, chiseled sex appeal, and a palpable power to Ferdinand Marcos. It’s a testament to his charm and magnetism that, while knowing all the while what Marcos really did, we still can’t help but fall prey to Mr. Llana’s alluring performance. He draws us in with one of the most beautiful songs of the evening, ‘A Perfect Hand’, which makes optimal use of its audience interaction as a news crew follows Llana around the room as he campaigns and poses with his constituents, projecting the images on screens and giving several audience members their moment in the limelight. If you have any doubt as to the effectiveness of the audience participation required of the program, it dissipates here.

As intoxicating as Llana’s Marcos is, the heart of the show belongs to Conrad Ricamora as Ninoy Aquino, who becomes the real champion of the people, giving voice and vitality to the emotional depth of the proceedings. His character is not without fault, however, and such complexities are what make this more than just a disco-karaoke romp. It’s a tragic fairy tale with a dark heart, shot through with jabs of hilarity, and soaked in moments of deeply-affecting pathos. That it manages to be this entertaining is a thing of wonder.

After a rousing song lamenting the assassination of Aquino, performed by his grieving mother no less, Imelda appears high on a ladder, decked out in a sparkling gown. “Why don’t you love me?” she sings, entirely oblivious to the devastation at hand, and fixated solely on herself.  She asks in a way both comical and earnest. If she has become a monster, we the people have had as much a hand in it as her, allowing ourselves to be duped, wanting to believe in something better for someone else, wanting to believe we had a champion.

Trapped in her opulent palace, she looks up as a helicopter roars overhead, waiting to whisk her and her husband away to exile. A figure the public has built up to be, reviled and revered, she stands as a symbol of her country, a symbol of someone we think we want to be – breathtaking, beautiful, cruel, glamorous, and greedy.

That’s the beauty of this production and its people -“ it’s ridiculous but at the same time moving, as hilarious as it is heart-breaking, and it requires a cast and crew that can expertly execute moves with precision and grace. The staging is intricate, with some hokey-but-effective choreography, and the audience moves with the action. In fact, if they don’t move they’re likely to get run-over. This immersive nature of the show works, as the audience becomes part of the People Party, standing in and making it onto the screen in news reports, dancing along with Imelda as she hits the hottest clubs of the world, and ultimately joining in a final demonstration of peace.

It totters on that tricky border between high-art and cheesy-sleaze – there’s certainly a bit of the tacky at work, but it’s done with a wink and a heartwarming smile. If you give yourself over to the guilty-pleasure aspects of it you can’t help but be taken to a fantastical place half-way around the world, moved to the paradisiacal and perilous plane of the Philippines, where the beat never slackens, and the party never stops.

{Photos by Joan Marcus.}

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