Mentally preparing for the holidays is a marathon of sorts for anyone with social anxiety. I’m much better at defining boundaries, opting out when necessary, and maintaining a calm composure when faced with people at their worst and best. This year especially, I’m good with simply saying no and spending a quiet evening with Andy.
That said, I know there are a lot of people encounters ahead, and I’m girding the loins for barreling through the next two months. Practicing patience and compassion is but a branch off of mindfulness, and though it’s not my comfort zone, it will be good to embrace a challenge. I won’t wholly isolate; I will work to share moments with loved ones. Joining in humanity for all of its workings is part of the ‘shades of gray’ project from twenty years ago (and currently being posted in bits and pieces) – it’s filled with observations of others rather than an interior introspection that often characterizes my writing.
I still feel a love for people, even when they make it especially difficult.
