“That’s not how this works, that’s not how any of this works… ” were the words running through my head whenever I would envision how to go about getting my Mom onto FaceBook. The Ilagan family was planning a big summer reunion, and the hundreds of messages I was getting from that FaceBook group were too much to wade through when one has a full-time job, makes his own dinner, and dresses himself in the morning. So Mom had to get on FaceBook, if only to deal with that. Besides, most of my daily activity is chronicled there so I figured it might make for a more communicative relationship. This was another way of staying in touch, so that’s how I’m billing it.
I jokingly posted, “My Mom is on FaceBook. Now I have to be good.” People said to block her, or tone down posts, or other such nonsense, all of which was laughable. Why would I block my Mom? She sees this website (hi Mom!) and she’s certainly seen much worse than anything that FaceBook would allow. One of the main social media adages that I’ve always applied has been to only post what you’re comfortable with your mother seeing. So there.
The challenge won’t be in censoring myself or making it palatable and easy to navigate – the challenge will be in getting her engaged and involved, because otherwise there’s no point. I’m trying to paint it as an online version of her New Year’s Day gatherings, where chosen family and friends come together to mingle and share a memory or a story or the simple workings of their day. It’s kept me at touch with people I wouldn’t normally get to see, and made the world a little warmer on lonely nights. It also reminds you of when birthdays are and other events, and eventually, if you invest information and engagement, it will leave you with a diary of sorts once the memories start piling up. That’s more useful than scrolling through fifty thousand photos from two years ago.
Plus, this will make gift-giving so much easier because I tend to post and link exactly what I want as soon as I see it. Everyone wins.
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