A mostly unremarkable anniversary occurs today, as this marks two years since I had a drink of alcohol. I say unremarkable not for its nature – not drinking, particularly in the midst of a pandemic, is a pretty impressive feat – but for its relative unimportance in my life. As my parents get older, and I see more people closer to my age pass away, it just seems like not drinking is rather a minor thing compared to all the other awful stuff happening. That said, I’ve been told this is something to honor, and so I’m taking this time to give a brief description of what worked for me in case anyone else is looking for ways to try out a booze-free lifestyle.
First, there was the desire. I had to want to change my drinking habits and lifestyle, and after a few years of not getting the same thrill or effect from alcohol, it was time. No one else can do that for you.
Second, I had to discover why I was drinking in the first place, and for me it went back to social anxiety and self-medicating during the uncomfortable moments. I needed a therapist to bring out such realizations, and then I had to dig into my own past to figure that out.
Third, I had to find something to occupy my time and thoughts in the first few weeks when not drinking felt somewhat foreign. For that, I took a free Yale course on happiness, which gave me something to do on the weekends and evenings, and I also began my meditation practice every day.
It was a system that kept me engaged and occupied, taking my mind off of drinking while addressing the root cause of it. (Suzie also remarked that I was a bit of an anomaly for being able to do it rather easily, so I can’t say that this will work for everyone or anyone for that matter – it was just what worked for me.)
And so, on the start of my third year of sobriety, I’m taking this moment to honor what has become a simple part of my life. (I’m also happy to talk about any of it in more detail, so don’t be shy in reaching out if you want to try it.)
PS – Old cocktail glasses and bottles can make charming little vases for seasonal floral beauty.
