Category Archives: Music

Surrounded By Light: Karel Barnoski

At the heart of every artist is the drive and desire to create and to connect. Different artists do it in different media, and those who cross the boundaries to understand how different types of art bleed into each other have a wisdom that leads to work that can be richly resonant. Karel Barnoski’s latest effort, ‘Surrounded By Light’ is a prime example of an artist who focuses on a single instrument – in this case the piano – which somehow becomes a vessel for mapping out a tapestry of emotion.

Beginning with the bright, hopeful ‘Rise’, a little preamble to the proceedings, ‘Surrounded By Light’ locates Barnoski where he feels most alive: painting with the piano, coloring with the chords, and shading with the surety of his nimble fingers across the keys. The title track eases things into contemplative motion, slowing and distilling the proceedings to a wistful, almost bluesy territory – the place where music transforms into feelings, becoming more than the sum of the sound, and landing in a glorious mix of emotions – that precise moment before an abstract painting becomes a mess, stopping just short of that at the place of brilliance. Barnoski clips his songs at just the right ripe moment – a sign of maturity and genius in an all-too-often overwrought and overextended world.

Knowing when to pause and invoke silence is the unappreciated secret to so much of music, evidenced by ‘Grace’, where the space in-between the notes holds the exquisite tension and anticipation of promised release and elegant resolution. Another secret to great music is allowing the listener to make their own journey, leaving enough room in the songs and their titles to allow multiple readings to shade every experience differently. ‘Message’ might be a missive, a rumination, or a warning; ‘Drift’ could be a trip, a wave, a wind, or a loss. 

Barnoski’s music evokes colors and light, shadows and shimmer, drawing a soundscape with strokes of sound that lift and bounce along as they do in ‘Held’ or undulate wildly and wonderfully as in ‘Sway’, each finding a way to sonically craft a world rich in texture and possibility. 

When an artist so deftly creates music that merges and demands the conjuring of mental images, it creates a connection with the listener that pierces the heart in a way that a stand-alone image or song, taken on their own, can never quite achieve. ‘Surrounded By Light’ is that sort of music – it asks nothing from us other than to be heard – it is the plea and unanswered prayer of the artist – and the beauty of that, in the generosity of spirit and shared experience, is what touches me most here. It defies explanation and description – it can only be felt, as in the magical waves of ‘Mystic’ and the closing contemplative elegy of ‘Complete’. 

I used to think that artists felt things differently from other people, that they somehow had access to deeper parts of the soul that the rest of us could never understand. As I listen to a song like ‘Self’ I’m no longer so certain we can separate and categorize people in such broad strokes – what I do know is that there are some works of art that speak to people in a universal way; they touch and tug at the heart because they evoke something primal at the core of being human. 

{Check out the new album here.}

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Dazzler of the Day: Micah McLaurin

Sometimes a single performance is enough to garner a Dazzler of the Day crowning. Such was the case when I happened upon the Madonna medley below performed by the divine Micah McLaurin. That alone was enough to seal the deal – when one looks deeper into McLaurin’s talents and accomplishments, it is clear that Dazzler is just the tip of the iconic iceberg. With soaring work in composing, performing, and fashion, McLaurin is a multi-layered artist whose entire being is a force of gorgeous, breathtaking inspiration. Check out Micah’s YouTube channel here for more amazing performances and prepare to be blown away; his website is also full of enchantment – find that here

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Dazzler of the Day: Omar Apollo

Mexican-American artist Omar Apollo is a singer, songwriter, and producer haling from Indiana. Since 2017, he’s been releasing his music to rapturous response from fans around the world. He’s currently on tour (and it hits Boston’s TD Garden on February 28) so check out his website here for upcoming dates. He garners his first Dazzler of the Day for making music that’s right for just about any vibe. 

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The Madonna Timeline: Song #170 – ‘Come Alive’ – Summer 2019

It’s been more than one hot minute since our last Madonna Timeline entry, and the shuffle has brought us to a happier, sunnier time: the summer of 2019, and what has shaken out as my favorite track from Madonna’s latest album ‘Madame X’. While lead single ‘Medellin’ held its own subtle magic and conjured its own giddy memories, the song that embodied the best of the ‘Madame X’ experience was ‘Come Alive’. 

I’m in the sky where I oughta be at, I’ve been watching you
Rocket ship takin’ off in that, now I’m onto you
Mouth closed, I don’t want your opinion, who you talkin’ to?
Stand out, no, I don’t wanna blend in, why you want me to?

Only with hindsight can we see how quaintly the world turned in the months before a deadly worldwide pandemic hit. That summer of 2019 in many ways feels like a last summer of innocence and carefree joy, which is strange, because at the time I don’t think that’s what most of us felt. Most of my tension and worry is bound in dwelling and ruminating about that which may or may not happen, and that depletes a lot of joy in what might otherwise be a wonderful time. Again, it’s something that only hindsight can truly teach, and since then I’ve been working on inhabiting the moment, and concerning myself only with what I can directly and currently control. The rest is not worth worrying about, for the most part, and that’s what this song has come to mean to me now. 

They say be all I can be
And all I want is peace, peace, peace, peace, peace, peace
See the world, haven’t seen it all
I wanna see its, see its, see its, see its, see its dreams

That said, it’s nice to revisit a pre-pandemic world, and I’m all for a trip down the section of memory lane that correlates with a summer season. Back in 2019, we were sitting on the patio by the pool and listening to ‘Madame X’ – a Madonna album that heralded the arrival of summer, not unlike the magical moment when ‘True Blue’ embodied its own summer a number of decades ago. Madonna and summer have a way of going together that just feels right – and pop songs somehow hit more intensely in the sunny season. ‘Come Alive’ should have been one of those summer hits – alas, Madonna was way ahead of the game, and more concerned with edgier fare like ‘Dark Ballet‘ and ‘God Control‘ than this piece of pop music perfection. She seemed to sense something in the air. 

Come alive, come alive
Come alive, come alive
Dream’s real, it’s alive
Come alive, come on

This song is all hope and exuberance and possibility – the very marks of what summer usually embodies, in its sun, its wonder, and its way of waking up the world to its own brilliance. Yet there is more at work here, in the drive and defiance that is a mark of all that Madonna herself has come to embody. A steely strength and determination pervades the message of ‘Come Alive’, a throwback to Madonna’s perennial message to ‘Express Yourself’ and a reminder that forty years into her historical career, Madonna still has to fight. 

I can’t react how you thought I’d react, I would never for you
Front line, I won’t stand in the back, ’cause you want me to
Mouth closed, I don’t want your opinion, who you talkin’ to?
Stand out, no, I don’t wanna blend in, why you want me to?

Summer is tumultuous that way – from the calmest and clearest of sunny days, storms and darkness can appear and suddenly descend on our happiest moments. In the continuing aftermath of COVID, summers feel less jubilant than they once did, as so much else does, but there is still a way to find that joy, even if it revisiting a summer that came before. Memories can bring happiness into the present moment. 

They say be all I can be
And all I want is peace, peace, peace, peace, peace, peace
See the world, haven’t seen it all
I wanna see its, see its, see its, see its, see its dreams

And so I return in my mind to that 2019 summer, when ‘Come Alive’ and ‘Crave‘ and ‘Crazy’ formed the only Vitamin C we needed. The world felt more carefree and innocent then, and perhaps it was – but it had its own issues, and were we to return to a more innocent time, we would also be returning to a more ignorant time. With knowledge comes heartbreak and hope, and a little thrill at still being alive.

Come alive, come alive
Come alive, come alive
Dream’s real, it’s alive
Come alive, come on
Come alive, come alive
Come alive, come alive
Come alive, come alive…

SONG #170: ‘Come Alive’ – Summer 2019

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Madonna’s Silver Anniversary of ‘Light’

The night was dark and breezy, but not too unbearably frigid considering it was only the third day of March. A midnight album release was something for which only one woman could convince me to postpone my bedtime, and there was something special in the air that compelled me forward. Before the instantaneous nature of the internet took off, entertainment news was still being whispered mostly on television and in print, and I got most of my info from the bible of ‘Entertainment Weekly’ or the purple section of USA Today. Still, word had trickled through about Madonna’s ‘Ray of Light’ album, and on its opening release day (night) in America, I stood in a line snaking around the Tower Records that once stood on Newbury Street in Boston. 

Her voice was booming thunderously on the sound system, and as we slowly advanced around the perimeter of the store, the title track came on and I understood that we were experiencing one of the greatest Madonna moments of all time. ‘Ray of Light’ turns 25 this year, and it still stands as her best album to date. While it’s incredibly risky to put a cap and definitive label on anything Madonna-related (she remains a transfixing and newsworthy woman, about to embark on her much-anticipated ‘Celebration Tour’ honoring four decades of music) it looks likely that ‘Ray of Light’ will remain her best album for a while. Its string of singles alone is legendary.

Lead track ‘Frozen’ had taken the world by mystical storm earlier that winter, an electronic ballad that heralded Madonna’s return to the pop throne she had helped craft in the 80’s, while pushing forward the boundaries of what pop music was, and what it might encompass. ‘Frozen’ was unlike anything Madonna had ever sung before, even if heartache and hope were mainstays of all her best music. 

Title track ‘Ray of Light’ could barely be held back as it raced out as the second single. Pounding through the summer of 1998, it sounded a clarion call for pop glory throughout the world and is still one of Madonna’s most beloved bops. That primal squeal of joy at its conclusion is pure heaven. 

The ballads are what ‘Ray of Light’ may be most rightly renowned for – including third single ‘The Power of Goodbye’ which absolutely nails the pop song as a cathartic experience. For all her provocative wizardry, Madonna has been one of my favorite artists because of her knack for making heartache and healing resonant through music. Saying goodbye to someone and surviving is a universal undertaking; Madonna sets it to evocative music here, as she does on the entire ‘Ray of Light’ album, and the results are breathtaking. 

The final official single in the United States was ‘Nothing Really Matters‘, a song that initially paled in comparison to the rest of the album, but has since advanced in my appreciation. At the time, it felt like a throwback to the earlier Madonna, a little light on message and meaning compared to something like the stunning album closer ‘Mer Girl’ but I’ve come to enjoy its pop magic in the ensuing years. Besides, Madonna is as much about celebration as she is about rumination – probably a bit more-so than the ‘Ray of Light’ album might lead one to believe. 

While the album is celebrating its 25th anniversary, it’s worth noting that ‘Ray of Light’ came out about fifteen years after Madonna’s debut. That’s the mark of an artist who is far more than the one-hit… well, now fifty-hit, wonder that many wrote her off to be all those years ago. It’s the mark of an artist in constant evolution, one who is unafraid to try new things and move forward to discover new visions. Most of all, it’s the mark of an artist who has defied the notions of what pop music can be, and what our pop stars can accomplish, and ‘Ray of Light’ remains her most potent and enduring testament to that power. 

TRACK LISTING:

  1. Drowned World: Substitute for Love
  2. Swim
  3. Ray of Light
  4. Candy Perfume Girl
  5. Skin
  6. Nothing Really Matters
  7. Sky Fits Heaven 
  8. Shanti/Ashtangi
  9. Frozen
  10. The Power of Goodbye
  11. To Have and Not To Hold
  12. Little Star
  13. Mer Girl

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Dazzler of the Day: Brandi Carlile

My favorite moment of the Grammys this year (yes, even more favorite than Madonna introducing Sam Smith and Kim Petras, which was epic enough) was Brandi Carlile’s wife and daughters introducing her performance. Carlile is no stranger to the Grammys, having added to her staggering total of wins again this year, and she is no stranger to many of my social media friends, as evidenced by the outpouring of love that happens whenever I see someone post something on her. She earns this Dazzler of the Day honor for a career of determined focus and singular talent, and for being brave and fabulous when it’s not always easy to be either. 

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Dark But Just A Game

This feels like a fitting song to kick off February – the shortest month of the year, and the last full month of winter – as we play games dodging time in the season of slumber. Supposedly it was inspired by a party that Madonna and Guy Oseary threw, attended by Lana Del Rey. Friends have been telling me for years that I would/should love Lana due to her dramatic way around a melody, and I’m finally coming around to it. This one is especially gorgeous. 

We keep changing all the timeThe best ones lost their mindsSo I’m not gonna changeI’ll stay the sameNo rose left on the vinesDon’t even want what’s mineMuch less the fameIt’s dark but just a gameIt’s dark but just a game…

In the thick of winter, this is the time when some of us lose our minds. I remember visiting JoAnn in Cape Cod a number of years ago, and her brother Wally regaled what they did to make it through the winter – and for all of the trickery and mind-games that we could conjure and use to make it through the doldrums, the bottom line was that it sucked. Sometimes the only way through was to get a few friends, get a little drunk, and do a few doughnuts in an empty parking lot as a winter storm barreled down on the base of that summer-getaway peninsula.

Those days are blessedly behind us, and I have found better ways to embrace the winter, choosing to engage rather than defy. It is always folly to defy winter. 

It’s dark but just a gameSo play it like a symphonyYou know our love’s the sameThey’ll both go down in infamy…

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This is Why I Shouldn’t Watch TV

If you know, you know…

and I’m completely wrecked after seeing Episode 3 of ‘The Last of Us’. 

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Candlelight Date Space

Twenty-two years into a relationship with someone, it’s sometimes difficult to find those moments of romance and intimacy, but every once in a while a romantic night surprises and unexpectedly delights with the simple gratitude of sitting next to your husband at dinner and a show. 

We began at our usual dining haunt in Albany, dp: An American Brasserie, where we ordered a few of our favorite dishes and eased into a rare Saturday evening out. No matter how many years have passed since we had our first conversation at Oh Bar, I still thrill at dining out with Andy. Even more thrilling than that is when he joins me for a concert, such as this Candlelight event of a string quartet playing the music of Taylor Swift at the Kenmore Ballroom. While I am a long-time-in-coming Swiftie now, Andy is decidedly not, so I billed this as a classical concert.

In the same way that I got him to sit through ‘The House of Mirth’ and any film with subtitles (hello ‘Crouching Dragon, Hidden Dragon’), I intentionally neglected to mention it was a Taylor Swift concert, he just thought it was a classical show. There is a photo I snapped when he realized what was happening, but that’s just for me. Happily, he said he enjoyed it, and we both loved visiting the revamped Kenmore Ballroom for the first time. 

It was during ‘Blank Space’ that I suddenly had that lovely feeling of gratitude and appreciation for Andy wash over me, the same way it has happened sporadically over the years, most memorably in this dinner overlooking all of Boston as we planned our wedding

The next day, I was sitting in Starbucks with a pistachio latte (my latest unhealthy obsession) and this version of ‘Blank Space’ came over the speakers, which was the universe’s way of cementing this romantic moment in my happy memory firmament. 

But I’ve got a blank space, babyAnd I’ll write your name…
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Dazzler of the Day: Sam Smith

Non-binary pop superstar Sam Smith (recently of the #1 smash ‘Unholy’) has been a lightning rod for pop culture notoriety, with talk disparaging their looks, gender, weight, and all sorts of things other than their music. All of that is distracting nonsense which says much more about the people talking than it does about Smith, who has been riding high over all of it, gleefully and rightfully flaunting their beautiful body in sequins, ruffles, pantsuits, and feathers – and I am here for all of it.

Check out the jaw-dropping excess of their latest single ‘I’m Not Here to Make Friends’ which simply fills every floor with the drool of the thirsty and the panting the entire world over; an absolutely mandatory exercise in modern-day fabulosity, it must be seen to be studied and adored, and I’m happy to report that even at this late stage of my game, I was completely floored. This is the stuff of artistic legend and pop legacy. It’s also why Sam Smith is winningly crowned Dazzler of the Day, for what is likely not the last time.

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Blanket of Hygge

Lighting a cadre of candles to make a stand against the cold, pulling a fuzzy robe a little closer around my neck, and setting up a pot of tea, I conjure the spirit of hygge. This is how we embrace the winter rather than stave it off – the latter being an impossible mission, we might as well admit. The days go much easier when we bend with their general flow instead of fighting against them. I wish I’d understood that a few decades ago. 

Here is a little song to echo the blanket of snow that covers the outside world right now. 

It’s a muted song, for a muted morning, in a world of blankets. Before the work day begins, and before the sky has lightened and turned whatever shade of gray we will get for the morning, I putter quietly around the living room while the tea kettle warms. Hello, winter, the soul implores, begging for the response to be kind and, dare we wish for such a thing, warm.

Most days there is no answer, such as on this morning. Only quiet and silence and the muted sense that things are in a state of slumber. It’s better than when the answer is a storm, when the winter claps back with a scowl and a threat. Softness is welcome. Kindness appreciated. The lack of an answer is just an answer to another question. Winter winds its madness around the brain like cold hands around a cup of tea. 

The kettle squeals. The day begins.

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Dazzler of the Day: Giuliano D’Orazio

Hot on the heels of a self-titled debut solo album, Giuliano D’Orazio has actually been a mainstay on the Worcester, MA music scene for years. A self-described queer rock and roll artist, D’Orazio earns this crowning as Dazzler of the Day thanks to the ten glorious songs that collectively comprise the rollicking tour de force of ‘Giuliano’. I can’t remember the last time I was so moved and entranced by an entire album (my favorites include lead track ‘Boy Next Door’, ‘Holy Grail’, and the powerful ‘Don’t Pray for Me’, but every song here is worth repeat listens). Check out D’Orazio’s website here for more information and music. 

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Dazzler of the Day: Casey Stratton

It was 19 years ago today that Casey Stratton released one of those albums that changed my life in the way that it conveyed exactly what I was thinking and feeling, even before I understood it all myself, in his pivotal work ‘Standing At The Edge’. Since then, I’ve been a fan of his music (he’s recorded 29 albums so far), and the way it has been his constant companion over the past two decades. In honor of this special anniversary, Stratton is crowned as Dazzler of the Day – for all the art he continues to create, and all the souls he has already touched through his work. Check out his website here for more music and beauty. 

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A Smoke-Addled Boulevard of Broken Dreams

It was a brutal winter’s night. Fragile but brutal. There was ice dangling in the air, too cold to drip. Smoke curling from the only glow in that darkness – the lit end of a cigarette, because we were smoking the hurt away. We dismissed our concerns with a flick of fingers and a sentiment cribbed from ‘Cabaret’: divine decadence. The wave goodbye, over the shoulders, was even less than the efforts that the wisp of a silk scarf made. We were young then, careless with our hearts, and, so much worse, careless with the hearts of others. We did it to make it through the winter. If there was warmth to be found in that decadence – in the burn of a cocktail, in the embers of a cigarette, in the arms of a stranger – I don’t think I found it. The traces of it, the echoes of it, the hints and peeks and dusty remnants of it – they never added up to anything more than a want or a wish, and as much as I wanted them to come together in something of substance, they disappeared like the smoke from my mouth, all too quickly melting into whatever formed the black night air of that winter. 

Who better than Marianne Faithfull to give voice and music to such a night? Who better to give voice to such a winter?

In the weeks leading up to Valentine’s Day, I would visit my friends at Cornell. Suzie was a fellow cynic when it came to love, perhaps even more acerbic at times than me. My broken heart’s club wasn’t assembled because the men fucked us over – it’s because the men never fucked us at all. Not the kind of fucking that was on my wish list. I wanted it all – and the men I knew then could only provide bits and pieces of it. 

And so that winter was populated by the boozy, smoky nights where we found solace in approximating the divine decadence of someone like Sally Bowles – a creature as lost as we often felt, encased in her tattered fashion and solitary style. I listened to Marianne Faithfull, whose voice was the embodiment of smoke itself, and the desperation of winter.

Fall burned in a way that winter never would. 

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The Light of a Superstar Long Gone

It is understood that we are only just now seeing the light from stars that may have been extinguished or imploded (or whatever happens when a star dies) years after the fact. Is that comforting or disturbing? I can’t quite decide. It’s certainly a bit of a mind-fuck when it comes to time and perception and the purpose or pointlessness of our tiny place in the universe. 

A similar sense of displacement and fuckery is at work when I find myself on the verge of sleep and wake, suspended in that dream-like bardo of worlds where what is real blends confusingly with what is past, what may have never come to pass, and what has yet to come to pass. Ghosts haunt that borderline realm – the ghosts of time: past, present and future – like some Ebenezer Scrooge parable. 

Long ago, and oh, so far awayI fell in love with you before the second showYour guitar, it sounds so sweet and clearBut you’re not really here, it’s just the radio

Don’t you remember, you told me you loved me baby?You said you’d be coming back this way again, babyBaby, baby, baby, baby, oh babyI love you, I really do

This haunting cover of ‘Superstar’ by The Carpenters gives me similar pause, an echo of the original that I posted about earlier. The song somehow becomes even more evocative in this version, a hazy visage drained of color like dreams or memories, and if the first post was one of youthful clarity, this one feels fuzzy and messy and the result of all my time on earth. 

Loneliness is such a sad affairAnd I can hardly wait to be with you againWhat to say, to make you come again? (Ooh, baby)Come back to me again (Ooh, baby)And play your sad guitar

For almost half a century, I’ve looked up at the same stars – the light from thousands of years ago. While my body aches and creaks and says so much time has passed, in relation to the stars this is merely a blip in the story of the universe. It lends all of us a certain humility, and humility will always be one of the most beautiful features of any human being. Too many of us (including myself too much of the time) forget to access or exhibit that at key moments – and every moment can be key when it comes to humility. At so many points, just a little dose of humility could have changed the course of history – personally and universally. When you think of how small we really are in the grand multi-dimensional scheme of time and space, it is gorgeously humbling

Don’t you remember, you told me you loved me baby?You said you’d be coming back this way again, babyBaby, baby, baby, baby, oh babyI love you, I really do

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