The middle-of-the-day lull in a single post.
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03
September
2019
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September
2019
03
September
2019
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September
2019
A Morning Visitor, or Three
Some mornings are made out of stillness. In the hour before I have to step into the shower and begin the regimented routine that will run like clockwork and ultimately deposit me at the office, I sit in the dining room and stare out the window at a scene made mostly of this stillness. Without even a breeze, not a single leaf moves, not one blade of fountain grasses twists in this silence. Then a happy commotion: a trio of goldfinches alights on the cup plant, disrupting the eerie scene with happy abandon. They are there for the seedheads which are finally beginning to ripen and fall. I pause to watch the three of them there, their bright-yellow feathers accented with splotches of black, almost like a mirror and camouflage beside the similar color scheme of the fading flowers.
All the beauty of the world, right there in my backyard.
A breeze picks up and the grasses begin to sway. Still, the finches peck away at their breakfast, the towering stems of the cup plant moving gently with their weight and the arrival of wind. I thought it was going to rain today, but it hasn’t started yet. Taking in the moment is nourishment for the soul.
02
September
2019
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September
2019
Maluma & Ricky Martin: Hunks Squared
This song was on my summer playlist and it’s a fun little bop. Better than that, it’s a duet with two hot guys. I’m guessing they’re singing about girls, but who knows with Mr. Martin. He is pairing up with Maluma, and together it’s some sweet music.
They add to their hot factor with this lovely summer-sounding duet. It joins ‘Medellin’ as a Maluma-inspired summer track, and it sounds really good. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: summer is not over yet. The bulk of this month is still within its province. Celebrate the sun (and Ricky Martin’s moon) until the very last day…
02
September
2019
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September
2019
Recap of Labor
The unofficial demise of summer is said to be today, but screw that – summer has a few more weeks yet. Let’s not rush it off so quickly, let’s hold onto its warmth for as long as possible. It never lasts long enough… whatever enough may be. Rewind to the week before, in this hopeless endeavor to perpetually repeat a summer that I am loathe to leave.
The cry of these summer trumpets was angelic to say the least.
A letter of love to Betty Lynn Buckley.
More first world problems for those of us in the first world.
Grandstanding like the old man I am.
Happy ending, fig-style.
18 years ago I was just getting started.
My birthday took place in Boston this year.
(And it was pretty splendid.)
Finally, my naked ass, set to beautiful words.
Hunks of the Day included Travis Wall, Blake McGrath, Chuando Tan, Richard Fleeshman, and Roberto Bolle.
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September
2019
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September
2019
01
September
2019
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September
2019
September Summer Nakedness
The book that is seeing me through the end of the summer is a delightfully decadent Italian romp that melds fact and fiction from the life and times of Tennessee Williams. ‘Leading Men’ by Christopher Castellani weaves real and imagined yarns of the writer’s life, and the circle of lovers and friends around him, while touching on the changing social structure of gay life then and now. It’s an entertaining read, but goes deeper too – a treatise on how we age, what becomes of our youth, and how we face – or don’t face – the passing days. I like a summer book that acknowledges and explores the darkness while putting on a glittering facade. Coupled with a few photos from my summer pool days of 2019, here are a few favorite quotes from the book, because Mr. Castellani is better with words than me.
Of all the desires, curiosity is the only one capable of keeping a person alive. ~ from ‘Leading Men’ by Christopher Castellani
Perhaps these were the two types of men in the world: those who kept trying to save you, and those who would forever test you. ~ from ‘Leading Men’ by Christopher Castellani
To be a romantic was to be seduced as easily by a beautiful boy as by a room full of jowly stonemasons passing around jugs of cheap chianti. ~ from ‘Leading Men’ by Christopher Castellani
By now, he was used to it all. And to be used to someone, to settle into his moods and demands and affections, wasn’t that something? Wasn’t that the best you could hope for, even when sometimes what you wanted most of all was to make love on a boulder for an audience of strangers, and to come back to the boulder every night at sunset to find that same man waiting there? Wasn’t that, possibly, everything? ~ from ‘Leading Men’ by Christopher Castellani
He came for someone else, but I was the one he chose. They are different things: being loved and being chosen. Being chosen is the more powerful drug. It enslaves you. And what you miss when it ends is not the man who did the choosing, but that rush of having been seen by him, and then plucked from the weeds, and then gathered up and hoarded and, yes, owned by him. These desires are out of fashion, but that does not make them any less true. I am sorry to be speaking in generalities. I am not trying to be elliptical. I am trying to tell you, in case you do not already know, that you will be loved by many men but chosen by only a few, and that knowing the difference will save you from making a fool of yourself. ~ from ‘Leading Men’ by Christopher Castellani
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August
2019
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August
2019
Boston Birthday Adventures 2019 – Part Two
Birthdays are often a meld of disappointment, relief, enthusiasm, ennui, and if you’re lucky a couple of unexpected but happy surprises. My 44thdawned without fanfare or let-down, on a beautiful sunny day in Boston, with blue skies and gentle breezes.
It began in simple and quiet form: a breakfast at Sonsie’s. Now, apart from a cocktail or two, I’ve never had a proper sit-down meal at Sonsie’s. I remember when it first opened so many years ago, and how popular and crowded it had been, and ever since then I’ve sort of avoided it. Not for any specific reason, it was one of those places that was always there. The older I get however, the more I realize how fleeting our time here can be. No day but today, and so we began with a mimosa, and a panhandler reaching into the cafe area for donated spare change. He was quickly chased off by a manager, and the live theater of Newbury Street resumed.
We made a few shopping stops before winding up at my favorite place in all of Boston, the Public Garden, where a fleet of geese and a few very sociable squirrels crossed our path. By this point. Andy was tired out and headed back to the condo, while I went on to Downtown Crossing for some solo shopping.
On every birthday, and every special day in my life really, I somehow manage to find a bit of alone time. Usually it’s not intentionally-planned, it just happens, and I am always a little grateful for it. I traipsed around the bustling stores downtown, then returned to the condo with enough time for some stoop gazing.
The Braddock Park fountain gurgled in the near distance and I watched the people and dogs walk by. It was a perfect afternoon – sunny but comfortable, and a beautiful breeze kept things cool. We had an early dinner at Explorateur, and though the Avery bar at the Ritz Carlton was closed, we found another place nearby that served a pre-theater cocktail.
Then it was time for Betty Buckley’s penultimate performance in ‘Hello, Dolly!’ at the Boston Opera House. The show was spectacular, so much more than I realized this chestnut of a musical could be, and at the end all the joy and love it exemplified put the perfect cap to my day of birth. A coda at the Bristol Lounge closed us out in the same way that we began: at the Four Seasons (albeit a different one).
The next morning was overcast and windy, the leaves of the oak trees lining Columbus Avenue were turned inside out, and when the host at Petit Robert asked if we would prefer to sit outside or in, we chose the latter, where we could watch the windy day safely ensconced behind a pane of glass. A post-birthday brunch made for an enjoyable Sunday morning, and after procuring cookies at Cafe Madeleine, we were back en route to Albany. Another trip around the sun had begun…
31
August
2019
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August
2019
Boston Birthday Adventures 2019 – Part One
Not every birthday has to be a big bally-hoo, but when it falls on a Saturday, I say why not? To that end, I crafted a long birthday weekend that began with a fancy dinner on Thursday night and carried all the way through Sunday brunch. The highlight was getting to see Betty Buckley on her penultimate night as Dolly Gallagher Levin in ‘Hello, Dolly!’ at the Boston Opera House, but I’m getting ahead of myself.
It began with a Thursday afternoon entrance to Boston, which was super-hot and sticky, and not at all conducive to walking, so we took an Uber around the corner to the new Four Seasons residential building which housed Zuma. Surrounded by construction, Dalton Street looked like it held promise, but it was still a bit far off. No matter. Once inside, it was a different world, and as we dramatically ascended a winding staircase that led from the lobby to the restaurant, I was a happy camper.
Andy was game and generous enough to try the signature omakase dinner of eight to ten chef-curated dishes (or so they told us) and the endless parade began. We ordered a pair of cocktails: the lychee and rose petal martini for me, and the burning history for him (Suntori Toki whiskey, honey, ginger, egg whites and barrel stave smoke).
Then more dishes came.
And still more dishes.
By the time the dessert boat of molten chocolate cake, raspberry meringue, and a couple of different ice creams arrived, we were beyond full. But you only live once, and this was worth it. (Even if it filled us up for the entire weekend.)
The next day we headed over to the Museum of Fine Arts to see the Gender Bending Fashion exhibit. They seem to be in step with the Met’s ‘Camp’ theme, and did their best with some memorable ensembles that I actually recalled from various red carpet moments.
We also got to try out the newly-refurbished restaurant (formerly Bravo and now 465), which had dishes that looked as gorgeous as they tasted. One would expect no less from the MFA.
Part of my birthday celebration included a visit to the Downton Abbey exhibition at the Castle at Park Plaza, and it was better than expected, as well as perfectly-timed for the release of the movie next month.
After experiencing the pomposity of that, we headed across the street to Nahita for some pre-dinner cocktails.
It’s my new favorite haunt, with a glorious cocktail menu, including the artfully-rendered ‘Sunset Over Instanbul’ – a perfectly-balanced concoction of gin, lemon, apricot liqueur, and orange bitters.
We ended the night across another street – at Strip by Strega – where a delicious steak dinner granted Andy his beef wish. We returned to the condo, where I spent my last night as a 43-year-old, peacefully convalescing until the clock ticked to #44…
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August
2019
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August
2019
Tiny Threads: An Insignificant Series
Me to a co-worker: You’re not good with numbers. Or letters.
30
August
2019
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August
2019
18 Years Ago I Became A State Worker…
On this date exactly 18 years ago, Andy drove me to the Department of State, then at the bottom of State Street, at the corner of Broadway in downtown Albany, where I began my career with the State of New York. Nervous and scared and unsure of where it would take me, I stepped into the role of Data Entry Machine Operator, the very lowest on the totem of entry-level positions, and began the journey that would become my state career.
When this blog has its fall season premiere – tentatively slated for September 23 – I’ll expound upon that journey – and all the various twists and turns it has taken over the years. It probably won’t appeal to anyone outside of fellow government workers (and probably not even them to be honest), but it seems as good a place as any to begin our 16thfall season on this website, when we look to re-set the stage, when others are going back to school and getting another chance to begin again. School and work, comedy and tragedy, yin and yang – we will be right where we need to be – and hopefully you’ll come along for the ride.
Before that, however, a few more weeks of summer are at hand, and a couple days of summer wrap-ups since I stuck around for the sunny season this year. Whether you liked it or not…
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August
2019
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August
2019
Tiny Threads: An Insignificant Series
Something that I love in small doses, at someone else’s house: cuckoo clocks.
See also Children.
29
August
2019
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August
2019
A Pair Among Dozens: A Happy Fig Ending
Our glorious brown turkey fig tree, which made such a showing already this year, gave me two delicious birthday presents when we returned from Boston (more on that trip in a bit). A pair of figs was finally ripe, and I hastened to cut them up and devour them in case we don’t get any more. The tree has been producing a multitude of fruit, but none of it looked close to being ripe, so I’d been researching tricks to hasten the process along.
The first was an instinctual one: to cut off some branches and pinch off a few growing tips to signify that the plant may be in peril and fruit production should commence to ripening as soon as possible. I also wanted to save a few stems in case our lovely pot doesn’t survive a winter in the garage.
The second was less well-known, and slightly more controversial. Like bananas, figs require a certain gas to ripen fully, and by sealing off the bottom of a fruit with some olive oil, it is said that this gas stays within the fruit, thereby impelling the ripening process. The controversial part is that fruit ripened in this method is said to be a little less sweet. Personally, I didn’t care – I just wanted something ripe regardless of how it was done. And it seems something worked – at least for two.
Oh, and these tasted simply divine.
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August
2019
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August
2019
Tiny Threads: An Insignificant Series
Whenever I get annoyed at the stupidity of people, I think back to the day in 7thgrade when my friend Tim was trying to console me about being annoyed with the stupidity of people. We were talking about someone who made some stupid statement, and he simply and succinctly said, “He’s surprised to see the sun come up in the morning.†It still makes me chuckle and takes away some of the annoyance.
28
August
2019
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August
2019
These Kids Today
When I see kids growing up online today it makes me glad I never had to do that. By the time social media was a thing, I was a grown-ass adult. Maybe I didn’t always act like it, but I knew enough that what was done here would be done forever – that you didn’t ever erase something that was online, so I made the decision to live as openly and freely on here as I would in my real life existence. In other words, it had to pass the mother/husband/best friend test: if it was fine for my Mom, Andy and Suzie to see, then it was ok to put up here. Thankfully, none of those people nor myself have been particularly prudish, and nothing I put up here has been disrespectful or rude unless someone really deserved it. (Hello Pier 1 Imports.)
As I get even older, I stand by just about everything that I’ve posted here. I may cringe at former righteousness or shirk off some shameless show-offiness, but for the most part I have no regrets. I can say that at this age. When I was fourteen years old, I couldn’t have done as well, so I’m thankful the internet wasn’t born before I was. A head-start makes a world of difference, and I needed it to get ahead of the trauma and drama that today’s social-media-saturated world can inflict.
When I see a teenager with a YouTube channel and millions of followers, I worry that they didn’t ever know what it was like to develop without being watched in some way, to grow and flourish and become who you were meant to be without the influence of perception on such a large scale. What does an absence of privacy and a chance to be completely alone and isolated do to a person? The next generation is about to find out, and everything I see happening in our world seems to be tipping toward a major shit-show. Part of me is glad I’ll be dead when all of it comes to fruition. And maybe somewhere these words will live on as a wish and a warning.
27
August
2019
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August
2019
Tiny Threads: An Insignificant Series
Where are we on the evolutionary timeline that no one can make a salad dressing container that doesn’t leak?
