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Author Archives: Alan Ilagan

Love In Bloom

Strange as it may seem, a little sadness and heartsickness have always been the mark of a good weekend or vacation. That is to say, if at the end I feel a little empty and down after a particular weekend, it’s a sign that a very good time was had, and I file it away in my room of happy memories. Last weekend we had one of those times, and we didn’t even need to leave Albany for it to happen.

Andy’s second cousin Tyler, and Tyler’s boyfriend Kevin, were visiting the East Coast from Arizona, so we offered to host them on their way to various parts of New York. Apparently/reportedly/supposedly I met Tyler at one of our first parties at our current house, a rare gathering of Andy’s family and extended family. It was years ago, and mostly I just remember making a bunch of apple martinis for his Dad. (The use of an apple martini should be a faux-carbon-dating technique to indicate just how long ago this was.) Tyler was just a kid, and likely didn’t register on my radar because, well, kids. I had a blast with his parents and they remain some of my favorite people. In the ensuing years, Tyler crept into that circle of favorite relatives as we’d see him at the occasional birthday or wedding or funeral – the extremes of life, along with all the heightened emotions and mental mayhem that go along with such gatherings. He and his parents were always a bright spot for me. As he grow into a young adult, it was easier to talk to him, and his intelligence and wit were keen indicators of where he was headed.

We had last seen him on a visit to New York, just as he was about to depart for Arizona. After a double-dose of Harry Potter plays, we slid into the last hour or so of service at the Chatwal, where Tyler and a couple of his friends regaled us with tales of youthful exuberance, and Andy and I moved into the older generation of gay couples without further ado. There’s something very special about when a family member becomes a friend. It doesn’t always happen that way.

When we heard they were going to be in the area Andy made sure to insist they spend a few days with us. There’s no better way to step into the summer season than to do so with a few guests.

The house was filled with Chinese dogwood branches (a nifty way of making maximum use of the remnants of judicious pruning) and a couple of bouquets of roses. It’s all too brief a season, so we must make the most of the time when it’s in residence. The same goes for guests, and Tyler and Kevin proved to be the spark that spun spring into summer.

We began with a sunny day by the pool, and I whipped up some Senor Sandwiches from this crazy-good recipe by Pati Jinich. A supply of grapefruit cocktails was on the ready, and the sun moved across the sky. Having taken the red-eye, both Tyler and Kevin needed a nap. Andy did too since he had been up all night making sure we got Madonna tickets (more on that happy tale later). Everyone slept until it was time for dinner, when we switched to the first rose of the season and a casual Filipino feast.

Suzie and family joined us for dinner and swimming, and then we stayed up into the night, talking and making brunch plans…

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Jumping Stumps with the Ilagan Twins

These days it’s much more fun to be behind the camera phone than posting in front of it. I’m sick to death of selfies, and not even a new selfie-stick has done much to curb that waning interest, but the opportunity to catch my niece and nephew in all states of silliness has not lost any of its enduring appeal or entertainment value. Like private jokes and home movies, this may prove less amusing to you than it does to me, but too damn bad. We need more family love in these parts.

In this quick series of shots, I directed the twins to act like they were crossing a dangerous stretch of molten lava. Not sure how those wooden stumps survived such temperatures, but there they were, and there they had to manage.

One of the best parts of being a kid is the power of imagination to turn the dullest of objects into items of enchantment. Such magic is especially powerful at the start of summer.

Soon fireflies will sparkle in the deep blue of evening.

June bugs will buzz from tree-top to tree-top.

And summer will unveil her long-awaited charms.

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A Family Kick-off to Summer

The grass was green, the sunlight was slanting through the trees, and the afternoon at my childhood home was idyllic. Andy and I drove to Amsterdam for a Memorial Day dinner with family. The lighting was perfect for a bunch of photos with the twins – these will show up in the Christmas calendars at the end of the year, but a fun sneak-peek is on preview here.

The unofficial start to summer was surprisingly filled with sun – a rarity this spring – and we took advantage of it with an outside dining experience. And this photo shoot. I’m not sure which we enjoyed more.

While Andy talked with Mom and Dad, I entertained the twins, first with these i-Phone pics (they also insisted on video, which I will not be posting on my YouTube channel because I hardly post anything on my YouTube channel, and it’s rather ridiculous that I even have a YouTube channel, but I digress…)

Following dinner, instead of letting digestion work its time-honored magic, I got roped into a game of tag with the twins. Thanks to all of us getting a little older since we last played, it was more and more difficult to get ahead of them. I no longer had to slow down to even the score – they were quick and relentless enough to genuinely give me a challenge.

Thus summer began at the Ilagan house.

A happier start I could not have conjured.

We left satiated and spent – the best way summer can close a day.

The twins are at a perfect age for summer memories, and I often wonder when that line of memory demarcation will solidify for them.

Will they remember the day that they started to catch up to Uncle Al as we raced through the grass together? Will they recall the way the sunlight filtered through the oaks and pines, lighting up the last of the lilac blooms and the bleeding hearts?

I hope so.

If not, maybe this Memorial Day post will memorialize it for the future.

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Once Upon A Project

In the spring night, whispers on the wind…

The calls of peepers, baying at the moon…

Somewhere the sound of water

The sound of life

And you can almost hear the plants growing.

There was talk amongst the pansies,

And chatter between the crocus,

That something was coming…

Something was in the works…

A hint… a mystery… a new…

Swirls of color,

Rainbow divine,

Palette of spring,

Floral design…

A New Project

Conceived in Winter

Born in Summer

~ J U L Y   2 0 , 2 0 1 9 ~

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A BroSox Adventure Begins Anew

Our annual Red Sox game weekend begins tomorrow, as Skip and I make our way to Boston for a game. I’m told the Sox aren’t performing in stellar fashion these days (my nice way of saying someone said they suck) but that doesn’t matter. To change things up a bit, we are doing a few things differently this year, starting with seats way out in right field. Or left field. One of the fields. In the bleachers. I was toying with the idea of bleaching my hair for the event, but that felt extreme for one game. If it was a double header I might have done it, but that will have to wait for another year. This time it’s one game, one night, and I don’t have the energy to be blonde right now.

We’re also going to aim for keeping things casual and cheap – a grand departure from, well, my entire life, but I’m game. It makes packing and planning easier when I only need a pair of sneakers, some ratty shirts, and a pair of shorts or jeans. Maybe that’s why most of my straight guy friends are so mellow – they don’t stress out over dressing well. I could get into that. Come to think of it, a lot of my gay friends do the same thing. Actually, maybe I’m the only person I know who makes such an effort to dress up anymore. This weekend I shall join the masses.

Other new forays, at least for Skip and I together, include Cambridge and Chinatown. We tend to stay closer to the condo – Copley, Newbury, the South End – with the occasional T-ride to Faneuil Hall. We’ll expand our repertoire, at least we’ll attempt it. The best-laid plans have a way of slipping into old habits. We’ve been doing this long enough that the years are blending together, but each trip has its own highlights and moments of demarcation. I can’t wait to see what those will be this time.

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Tiny Threads: An Insignificant Series

Open question for office building co-horts: why would you go to a different floor to use the restroom? I’ve done that when the men’s room is being cleaned and there’s a big sign on the door and tape blocking the way, but when it’s open why bother?

#TinyThreads

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The GLSEN Gala Gives Us A Clue

The cult-classic ‘Clue’ and its wacky cast of indelible characters form the inspiration and theme for this year’s GLSEN Gala, taking place next Thursday, June 13, at the Albany Lakehouse. This is one of my favorite events of the year, given its formal, dress-to-the-boas fancy attire (suggested and encouraged) as well as its noble cause. Come dressed as your favorite character, or simply get into the spirit of the thing with a few festive feathers or jewels. It’s the month of Pride – the time to be as fabulously extra as you can be.

Join us Thursday June 13, 2019 for THE Funky Formal event of the season at Albany’s Washington Park Lakehouse.

The black tie is entirely optional, feather boas & big hats are strongly encouraged.

Celebrate 21 years with us, as we continue to fund the Safe Schools Advocacy & Bullying Prevention Work of GLSEN NYCR, right here in the Capital Region of Upstate NY. Our mission is to ensure that every member of every school community is valued and respected regardless of sexual orientation, gender identity or gender expression.

Get your tickets early, and get them here

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A Gratuitous Jason Momoa Post

This one goes out to Kira, who is a big fan of Jason Momoa. I loved his dusty pink velvet suit at the Oscars this year. Mr. Momoa has been a Hunk of the Day previously, as well as general eye candy in posts such as this. Here’s another one for Kira, and all of his many fans.

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Tiny Threads: An Insignificant Series

Who types the closed-captioning for Spectrum News Albany? Asking for the literate.

#TinyThreads

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Flower Clock Countdown

How best to introduce a new project when it feels like we just had one?

I find it best to do so quietly, in small, little ways.

Like this flower clock countdown.

Summer

waits

for 

no

one

Outside of certain classical music circles, it’s rather an obscure piece. Enjoying none of the mainstream appeal of Saint-Saëns’s ‘Carnival of the Animals’ or Sergei Prokofiev’s ‘Peter and the Wolf’, the Flower Clock takes its inspiration from the transient beauty of the floral world. It reminds me of a quintessential summer day, practicing the oboe while the sun shone outside, a warm breeze gently rustling the curtains of the room in which I stood. My teacher had assigned the piece because it was a popular one for oboes. (We took our ducky features when and where we could find them.)

The green of the outside world was at its freshest – the leaves had not yet hardened off or deepened into their darker, more leathery texture. There was still time to stretch and grow into their hardiness. When youth is blushing and bursting forth, you don’t want to hurry the process. A season only lasts so long, and the more of them that pass, the faster they seem to go.

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Tiny Threads: An Insignificant Series

At first I was annoyed that the Queen would entertain Trump at a banquet. Then I saw him in white tie and tails. Well-played, your Majesty.

#TinyThreads

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Season of Not Caring, Sartorially-Speaking

Not an apathy toward the world – quite the contrary.

An apathy to what I wear and how my hair looks.

That’s the best part of summer to me.

I’ll get dolled up in fall and spring.

For summer, and to a lesser extent winter, the weather is too extreme to care about anything other than comfort. Hence the upcoming batch of sleeveless shirts and baggy swimsuits. (Not to worry, I’ll throw in a Speedo shot or two to maintain blog traffic momentum – and maybe it will even be me in it.)

As for other summer wardrobe, I’ve amassed a sizable cadre of caftans and cover-ups for poolside lounging, summer gatherings, and any possible beach trips. (Sadly none of the latter are on our horizon, but a guy can dream of the sea and dress for it even if it’s nowhere near.) Caftans and cover-ups are a godsend for those pesky comfort-food pounds I’ve been packing away since fall. Oh who am I kidding – give me a flowing piece of clothing that approximates a robe and I’m a happy clam.

Yum – fried clams. Bring it on home.

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Recapping the First Few Days of June

This month will fly by all too quickly, so I’m trying to pace myself and enjoy the moments as they come. That’s the whole point of the summer, and since we have a few more weeks before it officially arrives, I’m starting to practice now. On with the recap of the previous week… please take your time.

It began here.

A few #TinyThreads for a tapestry. 

This coat sparkled on Broadway.

My review of ‘The Cher Show’

Why’s it so cold?

The land of Massholes.

Pairs of pretty pecs.

June arrived in all of its splendor.

A Boston weekend that was all about a yellow dress

Hunks of the Day included Blake Jenner and Jay Harrington.

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Tiny Threads: An Insignificant Series

You know those grumpy parents who come home after a day of work and need a couple of hours of quiet time without bother or interruption? I am one of those grumpy parents. Without the annoying kids. Thank Christ for that small grace.

#TinyThreads

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June Dawns With An Explanation & A Tease

The happiest month of the year is finally at hand! School’s about to end and summer is about to begin. For the past two years I’ve also taken the summer off, but this year I’m going to see if I can stick around to deal with any summer doldrums that may crop up. I’m not promising anything, but there should be a post or two per day until I get back into the serious swing of things come fall. There’s also a new project to promote, and since it comes out in July I think it best that I be here to explain it all when the proverbial shit hits the fan. Just kidding – it’s my most kid-friendly work ever, so it’s safe for all to see. I’m still figuring out the best way to post it, as it’s more of a love-letter to the kids in my life (and their parents) than it is an artistic statement/project that stands alone. All intriguing, all new to me. It also marks my first foray into a new art form. But that will be seen soon enough. Best to stoke the anticipatory fire and fan the promotional flames. Let’s just say that it involves a lifelong obsession of mine and is, in its own way (wait for it…) groundbreaking.

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