I simply cannot wait for the new Madonna album.
That’s all.
Madonna posted a cryptic triple-triptych on her Instagram account, with nine images working together to one big red ‘X’ which we are all assuming is some message about her upcoming album (praise be). In the same vein of those who re-created her wire-bound face from the ‘Rebel Heart’ album, I made my own tribute because I like red and I like the letter ‘A.’
As for what this means in Madonna’s world, your guess is as good as mine, and I don’t even have one. Life is a mystery, and I’m not trying to figure it out anymore. Just give us some music, put your ‘Vogue’ costume on, and that’s your outfit for the night.
The 150th entry in the Madonna Timeline is due to be posted this weekend, so keep your eyes open for that. Until then, here’s a selective group of timelines that you may have missed or intentionally skipped. Best to come up to speed before we go much further. A quick recap of some notable timelines:
#133 – Easy Ride
#134 – Inside Out
#139 – American Pie
#140 – Express Yourself
#141 – Body Shop
#142 – Vogue
#144 – Mer Girl
#147 – Secret Garden
#148 – American Life
This is supposedly the famous Zac Efron Freedom Speedo, as put on the head of Rob Gronkowski.
I’ll leave you to draw your own conclusions.
{See more of the Gronk here, and more of the Efron here.}
Sometimes you happen to be in the right place at the right time to see something whimsical, adorable, and perfect for spring. That place happened to be Saratoga as two ducks made their way along a crosswalk and the traffic waited for them to pass. I don’t usually bother to whip my phone camera out to capture such sights, but I did this time, just as they made their way safely across the street. It was a happy ending, as we later passed them again dawdling near a building.
Who knew that Saratoga was so ducky? I thought horses were their thing…
I find it hard to believe that people are still falling for the full frontal jokes of this day, but silliness can be contagious, and I’ve been afflicted. On with the recap of the last week, in which Mercury finally slid out of retrograde and hopefully restored some order into life.
It began with a blue spruce in a blue sky.
These threads are not golden, but still worth a look.
Spring + Ice = Sprice.
The Beekman Boys introduced me to HSN.
The Madonna/Warren Beatty duet from ‘I’m Breathless’ and the summer of ‘Dick Tracy’.
This bird was the word.
Chris Evans: shirtless American superhero.
I need it, I want it, if you get it I will flaunt it.
Hunks of the Day included Peter Hermann, Mike Trout, Evan Antin, Jonathan Knight, Michael Berresse, and Ben Hunte.
Cristiano Ronaldo fans are in for a treat today, as the title of this post not-so-secretly reveals. Footballer extraordinaire, Mr. Ronaldo knows his way around a ball scene, and as purveyor of his own underwear line, knows a thing or two about boxer-briefs too. Keep scrolling to see the goods, but stop along the way for some gratuitous links.
See this post about his skivvies.
Or this one crowning him as Hunk of the Day.
His latest underwear design certainly shows off the piping.
And speaking of pipes… that full-frontal glimpse is just beyond the scroll-down…
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Happy April Fools Day! Sorry, it’s what we do here, and always have done. Here’s a bulge-tastic post of Cristiano for those who don’t want to leave mad.
{See Zac Efron’s full-frontal shot here.}
{See a full-frontal David Beckham shot here.}
{See Tom Daley’s full-frontal shot here.}
{See the Ben Cohen full-frontal shot here.}
A new art show curated by Albany sensation Tommy Watkins opens across the pond next week. ‘Chromantics’ is a show celebrating the use of color, something that appeals to all of us who love a little pigment, especially yours truly. Mr. Watkins also opened up the show for a few written pieces on the subject of color, so I sent one in and was lucky enough to be featured. While I sadly can’t make it all the way to the opening, if you’re in the area give it a look.
Watkins was an Albany institution whose work touched many and reached far beyond the typical insular circles of an art scene. He also supported and encouraged fellow artists with their creative endeavors, and I’d see him out and about on 1stFridays when he wasn’t busy putting on a show himself. The best artists are those who get out and spread their inspiration and enthusiasm, sharing their love for creative expression and genuinely thriving off such interactions. Check out the write up with all the requisite info below:
This April the Cornerstone Arts Centre in Didcot will be splashing its walls with a bright and colourful array of art works as it hosts the Chromantics exhibition. A selection of artworks from OVADA’s Associate artists pair together for a dramatic collection of colour and creativity.
This playful arrangement of striking work, including paintings and sculpture, set out to challenge the audience on what contemporary art can be. Curator and artist, Tommy Watkins, invites you to explore this unique exhibition and meet the people who are shaping Oxfordshire’s art scene.The title of the show comes from a fusing of the words ‘Chroma’ and ‘Romantic’ as a poetic way to say ‘To be romanced by colour’. This show hopes to highlight the special chemistry found when pairing different styles of art into a cohesive body of work. These artworks revel with the brilliance of summer and extol the crispness of a spring day, but most impressive, is that this show has brought together over fifty artists, demonstrating the strength of the creative community in Oxfordshire. With inclusion being the guiding principle for selecting artworks, Watkins was resolute when saying;
“My goal with this show was to bring many different creators together and let us admire the unique and special traits we all have as artists and even more so as people. I see a chance here for us to appreciate and celebrate what makes us all individuals and at the same time emphasise how we are so much stronger when we come together as one.â€
To add even more emphasis on unification Watkins has opened up the exhibition to include three poems from international poets and included artworks from a group of young artists through ‘The National House Project’, a charity that provides support to young people, enabling them to develop their own local housing.
As the first off-site exhibition for OVADA Associates, Chromantics demonstrates the organisation’s artist-led ethos. This event is the first formal collaboration between Cornerstone and OVADA and we can expect to see great things ahead with these two innovative organisations in collaboration. Cornerstone Arts Project Manager, Jessie Coller expressed her excitement by saying, “Cornerstone are delighted to be welcoming OVADA artists to our gallery with their stunning work. As a thriving arts centre, we are committed to supporting local artists and building relationships in the Oxfordshire area and we are thrilled that our conversations with OVADA have culminated with this fantastic exhibition.â€
To discover more vibrant events, programming and art opportunities please visit: www.ovada.org.uk and www.cornerstone-arts.org
We also encourage you to explore the great work taking place over at www.thehouseproject.org
Launch event: 6th April 2019, 5-8pm
Exhibition runs: 3rd – 28th April – 28th 2019 (see Cornerstone website for times)
Venue: Cornerstone Arts Centre, 25 Station Road, Didcot, OX11 8RJ, UK.Poets: Alan Ilagan, R.M. Engelhardt, Jasen Ward
Exhibiting OVADA Artists: Wendy Aldiss – Kate Aries – Didi Baldwin – Juliet Bankes – Lisa Bates – Betsy Bell – Sarah Birch – John Blythe – Luis Rafael Borja – Joshua Browitt – Sue Chamberlin – Aileen Creegan – Clare Crombie – Jan Crombie – Robin Danely – Phil Dobson – Elizabeth Gascoigne – Emily Gong – Julie Gooddy – Ellen Hausner – Mary Haynes – John Hazell – Katie Hellon – Deborah Hudson – Ala Jazayeri – Elaine Kazimierczuk – Gabriele Kern – Monica Lewis – Rebecca Lyne – Andrew Manson – Adriana May – Jacqueline McLaurin – Kieran McLean – Miranda Millward – William Milne – Jeremy Morgan – Naomi Morris – Christopher Neal – Sue Perstitious – Lucy Phillips – Jezella Pigott – Deborah Pill – Marina Price – Roger Pugh – Catalina Renjifo – Melissa Rodd – Marigold Short – Alex Singleton – Matt Smart – Brigitte Stepputtis – Katie Taylor – Gill White – Sarah Wills-Brown
Please note that works in this exhibition are family friendly.
There’s this robe…
So many stories in my life have begun with those three words, and thus far all have ended happily. I’m crossing my fingers that the same sort of magic will manifest itself for this post. This is the Bergman Robe. Produced by Mr. Turk, who never met a color combination or dramatic design he didn’t like, it takes the classic chevron stripes and puts them onto a gorgeous frame of clothing that drapes ever-so-exquisitely over the body. (Yes, I realize the body is what’s being sold here, but who am I not to buy? I mean try?) Even with that, my focus and gaze is on the robe. It’s the eternally elusive trick: it’s not an object you’re purchasing, it’s an attitude, an atmosphere, an air. If one buys into it, and I always do, it’s worth the $298 price tag. Yes, it’s exorbitant. Yes, it’s ridiculous. And yes, it will make me happy – because fashion is more than a means to an end – it’s an event, a memory, a moment in time captured forever. I’ve been reading that instead of expensive jewelry and other material possessions, we should be investing in travel and experiences. For me, this robe is an experience. It will lend itself to be worn on special occasions – and I will remember those occasions as much for the robe as for whatever cologne and whatever guests and loved ones are around me at the time. It may even be the experience itself. I still remember the evening I wore this velvet and ostrich feather extravaganza, alone in the Boston condo in the middle of winter, fantasizing about the future and the past, and somehow making a memory that has lasted to this day. The robe made that experience happen.
As for the Bergman robe (which you can purchase here if you are so inclined), I’ve had my eye on it for a while, and I have a few ideas on when I’d like to wear it – a fancy brunch, a summer show, a flower party, a visit to the Saratoga Auto Museum to complement the Chevron design… so it will not go to waste. I’ll even pose for a few pictures in it. If you’re going to twist my arm…
After years of confusion, anger, and disappointment, I’ve finally come to the realization that I’m one of those unfortunate people with whom the universe just wants to fuck. Four out of five times that I go to Starbucks, the half-and-half container is empty when I get to it.
It’s no mean feat that Chris Evans captures Captain America so perfectly in the Marvel movie series. While we have celebrated his physical appeal and handsome factor here on this blog, Mr. Evans seems to be a pretty spectacular human being without the fancy shield and form-defining superhero outfit. His twitter feed is a brave condemnation of all the cruelty the current administration seems hellbent on executing, and such courage from a mainstream Hollywood movie star is both refreshing and necessary if we are to move forward. He’s on the right side of history, bravely reminding us of the compassion, integrity, and equality upon which our country was founded. That it comes in such a pretty package is just a bonus – a bonus that we will celebrate in this grandly gratuitous post. Scroll down for links to much of the magnificence that Chris Evans has brought to these pages.
As Captain America, Chris Evans stunned the world with his buff body and soulful channeling of decades of wisdom, but some of us have been fans long before that (thanks to an epic human banana sundae scene that shall otherwise remain nameless).
With those piercing blue eyes, he seduced and secured his status as matinee idol, a throwback to the glamorously rugged and impossibly compassionate Hollywood stars of the past. The banging butt GIF as seen in this post didn’t hurt either.
Even in a simple T-shirt he can lead a brigade of Hunks to glory, and still shine the brightest.
Thankfully, he’s not been shy about doing a few nude scenes, and with a body like that no one is complaining.
He more than holds his own in posts filled with naked male celebrities.
He even looks impeccable in a blue tux and beard. Not everyone can pull that off.
Sometimes, though, he shines best when simply shirtless.
Some television theme songs are infinitely better than the show they actually introduce. ‘Falcon Crest’ was always that way with me. Part of it was that it was on after our bedtime, so this was all we could usually get away with watching before being forced upstairs. But even in later years, when I could stay up to watch, the opening theme was always better than whatever followed. Even with Jane Wyman.
On this Friday, here’s a little memory for those who share my love of opening themes.
{Note: The Madonna Timeline is an ongoing feature, where I put the iPod on shuffle and write a little anecdote on whatever was going on in my life when that Madonna song was released and/or came to prominence in my mind.}
I suppose I should be grateful that Part 1 came before Part 2, otherwise it might have been awkward. As it stands, this Madonna Timeline will prove difficult enough, so I’m going back to basics, reminding myself of what this blog feature was originally meant to be. An encapsulation of what was going on in my life when a certain Madonna song came to prominence – whether that was in the world, or in my private life. In this case, it will mostly be my own little memory, as ‘Now I’m Following You, Part 1’ made about as big an impact as ‘Now I’m Following You, Part 2’ – which is to say not much.
It formed the main lip-syncing portion of Madonna’s Blond Ambition tour, appearing in the Dick Tracy segment. The period feel of the music and innocence of the sentiment is all fully intact in Part 1. We’ll get to Part 2 in another timeline.
‘I’m Breathless: Music Form and Inspired by the Film Dick Tracy’ was released in the spring of 1990 – just as the movie was about to come out, and Madonna was riding high on the wings of ‘Vogue’ and the Blond Ambition Tour. It was one of the most iconic moments, following as it did on the heels of ‘Like A Prayer’ and presaging the sexiness of ‘Erotica’ to come. That spring melted into a hot and sultry summer. Sticky and humid like all upstate New York summers, when the air hung thickly with the sweet scent of mockorange and fringe tree. The decadence of ‘Vogue’ brought the masses to the showtunes of Stephen Sondheim, who helmed a trio of songs on the album, while Madonna and Patrick Leonard fashioned their own selection of convincing period music, which included ‘Now I’m Following You, Part 1.’
I loved that album – its moody theatrical bent combined my love of Broadway with my love of Madonna – and it came with me (in my mind only) when I visited the then-Soviet Union. Upon my return, I resumed its non-stop rotation.
Oh, I almost forgot the most notable part of this song – it’s a duet with Warren Beatty! What is Mr. Beatty doing singing on a Madonna song? La publicidad! And maybe some romance was actually in the picture too – who can say? Dick Tracy was a hit for both of them, even if it cost a lot to make, restoring some silver screen luster to Madonna’s rather rusty track record. Looking back with the benefit of hindsight, this appears to be a rather sweet period in Madonna’s career and romantic life. She was tottering on the verge of mainstream Disney approval, and maybe playing it so safely bothered her. She would eventually take the road less travelled, which is what most of us loved about her, leaving Disney in the dust and provoking the Gods of Sex into orgasmic, damning glory. But that was a year or two away. For now, they danced until the record skipped…
SONG #149: ‘Now I’m Following You – Part 1’ ~ Summer 1990
Your midday treat comes in the form of some cake by Pietro Boselli. (But where’s the tea?) Heâ’s been here numerous times before – below are a few links with additional nude Pietro Boselli shots.
An underwear-clad Pietro leads a recap.
In my mind, adding a small piece of melon to a pound of prosciutto makes it a healthy snack.
#BeHealthy
Only the Beekman Boys could get me to tune into the Home Shopping Network and then actually purchase something. Their products are so good, and their explanations and knowledge so convincing that the goat milk soap and lotion they were peddling were too good to pass up, especially at the special prices.
I’ve long been a Beekman 1802 fan, and even at full price their goods are more than worth it. Quality and customer care shouldn’t come cheap, and supporting a local upstate New York farm comes with its own sense of doing something better for the community. The use of natural ingredients (in this case goat’s milk) is something else to feel good about – not only for its environmental health, but also for its soothing properties and scientifically sound explanation on why it’s so much better for the skin. (They made a compelling word picture of describing how oil and petroleum simply sit on top of water while something like milk mixes with it – a powerful testament to how most soaps and lotions stay on top instead of absorbing and hydrating the skin. Listen to them tell it, it’s much more entertaining.)
I wanted to try just about everything, and much was selling out, but I disciplined myself to one blind-buy: the Fig Leaf Whipped Body Cream – better known as the Voluptuous Fig. Whether it was Brent’s seductive way of rolling off the name, the luscious description of the cream itself, or the way it thickly clung to Josh’s fingers clearly depicting its substance, I was sold. It helped that I loved all things fig too.
For the remainder of items, I’m planning on making the short pilgrimage to their brick and mortar store in Sharon Springs – just a hop, skip and jump away from Albany – in order to try out the other scents and products. It’s been a few years since we last visited and we are overdue for such beauty.