It’s a good thing I never got into heroin. Or crystal meth. Or bath salts. Well, aside from their intended use. I love bath salts in a hot bath.
Author Archives: Alan Ilagan
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April
2019
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April
2019
A Purgatorial In-Between Place
The purgatorial period between Good Friday and Easter was always one of suspense and tension in my childhood home. The kids among us were usually just thrilled to be on Easter recess, but in the oppressively-Catholic atmosphere of our house, the apparent death of Jesus and the impending resurrection left us in a state of limbo. Even when our favorite Uncle would visit, there was a halting aspect to our celebration, the way death hangs over everything when it touches us.
The weather being so volatile and variable at this time of the year, and the date of Easter always switching from early to late to everything in-between, also wreaked havoc with one set of scenes or circumstances. We’d vacillate between days outside in mud and rain, to days inside with snow and sleet, to days outside in sun and splendor, to days inside in peaceful slumber. Sometimes there would be violets already in bloom, other times there would be snow on the ravaged tips of barely-rising daffodils. Everything seemed to be in a suspended state of indecision.
So it is on this Saturday, as we wait in joyful hope of His coming, an eternal reminder and symbol of returning hope, the way spring always comes back, the way summer follows suit. Amen and Halleluh!
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April
2019
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April
2019
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April
2019
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April
2019
Tiny Threads: An Insignificant Series
There are some days when Albany can’t handle the party going on below my waist.
#GoToHellPants
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April
2019
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April
2019
Summer by Louis Vuitton
Les Colognes Louis Vuitton.
Those words taken together should strike terror into Andy’s heart, because the last time I experienced a Louis Vuitton obsession he was generous enough to gift me with one of their classic Keepall bags at a price point which shall remain absent on this site. The fact that they have been doing fragrance for a couple of years was not lost on me, but I never ventured into any research or experimentation because, well, money.
With the Les Colognes collection, a trio of summer-inspired scents looked as if the House of Vuitton might be making a more mainstream attempt at fragrance at a slightly more affordable level. (And it turns out that at $250 one gets 100 mL, which is roughly the same cost of a Tom Ford Private Blend, only with twice as much product.) Enough vulgar cash conversation, we are here to determine the merits of the scents themselves, not a financial lesson which I have no business giving.
Jacques Cavalier Belletrud is the perfumer behind the three offerings: Afternoon Swim, Cactus Garden, and Sun Song. Artist Alex Israel was tapped to design the flacons and packaging – brilliant, colorful works of art in vibrant shades of blue, green and yellow – ideal for the sunny, beachy, summery feel of the set. It sounds heavenly, as much for the specific notes as for the season they portend. Sun Song offers the sweet citrus of orange blossom; Cactus Garden gives off a green, lemongrass effervescence; and Afternoon Swim, on paper at least, sounds like my perfect cup of summer sun tea, with its mandarin and bergamot breeziness.
Citrus is notorious for its fleeting nature, gone too soon like summer itself, but this is the one season of the year where I don’t mind so much. Heavy, cloying, monsters of sillage have no place in the lighter days when heat and humidity strike down all in their path. Besides, a re-application during the day is a welcome boost when the afternoon starts lagging.
Of course, this throws a sweetly-scented wrench into the spring/summer cologne proceedings, which up to this point have been dominated by selections from Hermes and Diana Vreeland and possibly Tom Ford. Will Louis Vuitton topple such venerable favorites? Only the summer knows…
18
April
2019
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April
2019
The Boy in Overalls and Keds
“He wanted, as did I, to become something he’d neither yet seen nor dreamed of, something he’d recognize the moment he saw it: himself. Yet he was constantly confounded, for no matter how much he adorned himself with scarves and jewelry, he could not understand that this was himself, as was also and at the same time the boy in overalls and Keds. He was split in two pieces – as who was not? – the blond wave cresting rigidly about his close cropped- hair.†– Richard McCann, ‘Mother of Sorrows’
Engaging with a recent bout of nostalgia, and embracing all that we were, I find myself taking a brief sojourn back in time to when we were young. Writers such as Richard McCann, who wrote the featured quote above, are much more adept at evoking such memories. I can only approximate what it was like, what I was feeling, and mostly it only resonates with me. Still, most of our memories convey similar wistfulness and longing, and perhaps you can relate to reaching an age where you have just as much to look back on as you do to look forward to. I hate ending a sentence with a preposition, but sometimes you have to do things you don’t want to do. Like looking back. Now I’ve gone and muddled the day before it’s even begun. That’s what revisiting the past can do.
17
April
2019
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April
2019
Medellin by Madonna & Maluma
A shuffling little tropical trifle, this breezy ditty is really like nothing Madonna has ever done before. With the aid of a very relaxed Maluma and his reggaeton influence, it’s the perfect encapsulation of the coming summer, and Madonna’s intimate and occasionally whispered vocals (slightly reminiscent of the ‘Ray of Light‘ album’s beginning and ending) strike new territory for pop’s returning queen.
I like its casual, soft-focus vibe, and at this point in her career Madonna doesn’t give a fuck about the haters, so silencing the anonymous online trolls requires nothing more than a shrug. I’m a die-hard fan who enjoys most of what she does (not all) and I happen to already love this one. It’s a lovely intro to the ‘Madame X’ experience, as well as a wonderful, wistful slide into the spring/summer seasons. This was made for summer lounging, pool parties, and sunny drives. It doesn’t bother trying to live up to impossible expectations, and ends up giddily surpassing them because of it. Sometimes you just need to enjoy what a song sounds like and go with the flow. One-two-cha-cha-cha…
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April
2019
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April
2019
Tiny Threads: An Insignificant Series
If you are asked what something might mean to you if such and such happened, don’t cop out and say “it would mean the world to me.†Trite nonsense is time wasted.
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April
2019
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April
2019
A MidSummer Day’s Gin
Last year was all about the Ketel One Grapefruit Rose vodka seen in a photo in this post (thank you Carl!) – but this summer’s libation may have something to do with Hendrick’s MidSummer Gin. I love a floral gin – especially when making something like a lavender cocktail. This bottle of Hendrick’s may lend itself to something in the rose order of things, and I think it will work well on a simpler level as well, perhaps in a gin and tonic.
According to the literature, this extremely limited edition is already becoming scarce: “This one of a kind experience, like the gin, is but fleeting – limited by nature – but glorious while it lasts… whisking the curious to a heady world where flowers are at their most potent, love at its most powerful, and possibilities at their most infinite.”
All right, I’m on it. As the Countess once exclaimed, “Get me a bromide… and put some gin in it!” Summer will arrive before anyone is ready, and gin works best in summer.
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April
2019
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April
2019
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April
2019
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April
2019
Madame Will See You Now
The dawning of a new Madonna era is upon us, as Madonna teased a snippet of her new album on Instagram yesterday, along with some tantalizing sneak-peeks at some of the accompanying visuals. She has christened her new album ‘Madame X’ and it sounds like an absolute return to what Madonna does best: evocation, provocation, and titillation.
The shape-shifting nature of her chameleonic ways seems to be the focus here, which may be the smartest way to move ahead in our fractured pop world. Madonna’s always been about the mask, transforming into a new guise every few years, shedding her skin like a snake and revealing a fresh set of fantastical scales.
So much of the problematic nature of her public persona might be attributed to people wanting her image to align precisely with the person she is. The truth is, we all wear masks. We are also different people as we evolve and grow. Madonna embraces this and it makes some of us uncomfortable. We want our idols to remain who they are when we first worshipped them. Some won’t ever get beyond Madonna as faux-virgin material girl. And some of us have left that all behind.
I’m ready for the next adventure. Bring it on, Madame X.
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April
2019
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April
2019
Tiny Threads: An Insignificant Series
There’s always a chance this may change, but I honestly don’t see myself getting into a backpack anytime soon. Not even if Tom Ford is selling one.
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April
2019
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April
2019
A Recap Adorned by Palm Fronds
Parting the palms: it’s the day after Palm Sunday and high Holy Week is upon us. May this one be higher than the Empire State. It’s also a rainy Monday, which makes moving into this week extra fun. On with the recap…
Cody Christian went shirtless.
The thread of threads continued.
The staggering beauty of Diana Vreeland.
Our Broadway Weekend with Mother has been finalized.
Recalling the vintage (and my old goatee).
Returning to the scene of my crime.
Hunks of the Day included Garðar Thór Cortes, Toby Levins, and Gideon Glick.
14
April
2019
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April
2019
Men of Shirtless Miscellany
It’s a Sunday in April, and spring deigned to visit this weekend, allowing me to fill about fifteen lawn bags of yard debris in preparation for the garden season. (We are well on way to our usual 40.) My aching back is proof of those efforts, and rather than sit in some uncomfortable position and type a bunch of stuff for this blog, I’m taking the say way out with something easy on the eyes: a collection of shirtless gents who have graced this site with their beauty.
We begin with Bryce Eilenberg, beloved ginger from RuPaul’s Drag Race. Mr. Eilenberg has populated previous posts with his fiery physique, as seen here.
A trio of Henry Cavill GIFs is a gift that keeps on giving. For more Cavill action, visit this post or this post or this post.
Finn Balor has been a Hunk of the Day here previously, as has Roger Frampton. Both are worth another look.
Danell Leyva knows how to work a pommel horse, especially when naked, which was seen in his Hunk of the Day post.
Two of the coolest men in entertainment are Idris Elba and Adam Levine. More of the former can be seen in this Idris Elba post, and much more of the latter can be seen in this shirtless Adam Levine post.
Heading over the pond, Dan Osborne exemplifies the best of the man-spread. He’s been here sans underwear altogether here, here, and here.
Joe Jonas makes up one-third of the Jonas Brothers, but he is one full package in his Guess underwear ads.
Finally, a double-poser shot of Jack Laugher and Dan Goodfellow closes out this shirtless/Speedo Sunday post. See Jack Laugher bulging in another Speedo here, and then visit Dan Goodfellow in his Speedo here.
