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Author Archives: Alan Ilagan

Upside Down You Turn Me

This spring has been a roller-coaster of a weather ride, continuing the utter insanity that we all wanted so badly to leave behind in 2020. The world apparently doesn’t go by our calendar or schedule, as there is still cray-cray everywhere you look. After last year’s pool debacle, I’m not counting on it being open anytime soon – it’s easier to deal with disappointment when plans aren’t made. And so we peer into the reflections afforded by the pool cover’s dark magic, when spring appears in the sky and reflects its muted glory in the dim waters. 

A change in perspective is good for shaking shit up. 

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Dazzler of the Day: Chloé Zhao

As the first woman of color to win the Oscar for Best Director, Chloé Zhao earns her first Dazzler of the Day honor, an admittedly paltry gift given all the other awards she has earned this past year for her film ‘Nomadland’. She gave a wonderful acceptance speech in which she said she has always followed a Chinese saying she learned as a child: “People at birth are inherently good.” I like that message. I wish I believed it as much as Ms. Zhao, and I’m grateful she gives me that bit of hope.

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Old Friends Gold

NEW FRIENDS SILVER
OLD FRIENDS GOLD
WE’RE LIKE DIAMONDS
TRUTH BE TOLD
PEOPLE COME AND PEOPLE GO
WE KEEP SHINING SOUL TO SOUL

For our first few BroSox Adventures, the theme song was ‘Something New’ – it felt like a good embodiment of my friendship with Skip, but after our epic 2019 excursion we were planning on shaking things up a bit, since it was no longer so new. The world took care of that for us in 2020, shutting down all travel entirely, and forcing a change-up upon us even if it wasn’t entirely welcome. As we plan our return to Boston this year, it seems like the right moment for a new song to pair with the moment. As Skip is the newly-obsessed fan who brought me back to RuPaul’s Drag Race earlier this year, it’s fitting to make this one of the theme songs for our next journey.

SUN WENT DOWN IN OUR HOMETOWN
THEY ALL GOT MARRIED, I DIDN’T STICK AROUND
I SET MY SIGHTS ON HOLLYWOOD, OH, OH
I NEVER WENT HOME AGAIN, WENT HOME AGAIN
MOST THINGS CHANGE, BUT SOME THINGS DON’T
CAUGHT IN A CYCLE LIKE THE TWILIGHT ZONE
THEY WOUND UP IN THE LOST AND FOUND, OH, OH
NEVER HEARD FROM AGAIN, HEARD FROM AGAIN

The break of 2020 was a good delineation between those first chapters and what is to come. In many ways, we are starting a new story, a new journey, as we are both in very different places than we were when we last took Boston by gleeful storm. A couple of years into those early adventures, I remember sitting in Fenway Park remarking that I hoped we would still be doing this when we were 80 years old. To sustain it, we change and evolve as the years pass, and the world crumbles and rebuilds itself around us. Throughout it all, we maintained and sustained a modern-day friendship – by texting and social media interaction and the occasional socially-distant meet-up for shopping at Trader Joes or a shared coffee in the Starbucks parking lot, shouting from our cars as a late-winter snow shower began spitting from the sky. 

NEW FRIENDS SILVER
OLD FRIENDS GOLD
WE’RE LIKE DIAMONDS
TRUTH BE TOLD
PEOPLE COME AND PEOPLE GO
WE KEEP SHINING SOUL TO SOUL

It takes quite a bit to break through into my true friendship circle, but once that happens, when my armor is breached, I tend to be quite loyal. Skip’s loyal in the same way, and I always feel a badly-needed sense of safety when I’m with him (and his amazing wife Sherri for that matter). During this past year, most of us have come to realize the importance of friends and family, and the way the simplest interaction and contact is vital to our well-being. 

As we begin planning for our return to Boston, we know how much the world has changed. Will it go back to what it was before? I don’t know. Certainly not yet, and certainly not by June. But what has remained blessedly stable is the friendship we share, and the excitement we feel whenever the thought of a Red Sox game rears its head at this time of the year. 

KINDA LOST TOUCH, BUT WE NEVER FELL OUT
FROM HAPPY TO HEARTBREAK, TURNING UPSIDE-DOWN
AND EVEN WHEN THE CHIPS WERE DOWN, OH, OH
I ALWAYS KNEW I HAD A FRIEND, I HAVE A FRIEND
NEW FRIENDS SILVER
OLD FRIENDS GOLD
WE’RE LIKE DIAMONDS
TRUTH BE TOLD
PEOPLE COME AND
PEOPLE GO
WE KEEP SHINING
SOUL TO SOUL

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Dazzler of the Day: Regina King

Her Louis Vuitton dress was my favorite at this year’s Academy Awards, but Regina King has earned this Dazzler of the Day for her decades-long entertainment career, over which she is currently reigning as actor and director. I remember watching her on ‘227’ on NBC when I was a kid, and she was one of my favorite characters thanks to her studious and sharp delivery. The spark she delivered even at that early stage has carried through the long trajectory of her artistic journey, and whenever she’s on stage or screen (or shining behind it) she mesmerizes. 

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A Vivaciously Bold & Vivaciously Bitter Recap

The full moon rises tomorrow and I’m completely over it. Hopefully that is the reason for all my irritation and agitation of late, because I am sick of the cold and the wind and the things that have gone wrong even at this early stage of spring. We earned something better than this, which is why I went into the cologne cabinet the other morning and spritzed some of Diana Vreeland’s ‘Vivaciously Bold’ on then put the photo up on Instagram (among other things). My senses reinvigorated immediately, so don’t let anyone ever tell you cologne isn’t worth it. On with the recap (and perhaps the only post of the day because I was locked out of my website during the time I normally would have populated some crap better than this). Happy Monday!!

Let’s begin with the murder that almost happened at Walmart, because that’s the vibe I’m feeling right now, and it’s not pretty. 

These pink-cupped Narcissus were much prettier.

When the bark is the bite.

This week my jury memories were jogged, and jogging isn’t always good.

The Korean Victorian Holiday House

Color design by Narcissus.

Recalled to Boston life.

Grin and pear it.

Hearts of tulips.

Dazzlers of the Day included the luminous likes of John Cena, Snoop Dogg, Mel Odom, Victoria Beckham, Lourdes Leon, and Rosé.

 

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There was Almost a Murder at Walmart

Apparently you have to be 18 years old to purchase spray paint now. I found this out the insulting way as I was self-checking out of Walmart with a can of bright yellow spray paint for some outdoor accent furniture, and a pack of sandpaper. As I tried to complete the transaction, the screen refused to let me finish, saying an associate was needed to help. After calling a young woman over, she punched in some code and the question came across the screen: Is the customer over 18? The woman very quickly, too quickly if you ask me, clicked ‘Yes’. 

“Are you sure?” I asked from behind my mask, laughing a little.

I can see your hair,” she replied.

So it’s like that.

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Dazzler of the Day: Rosé

Leave it to Skip to get me back into RuPaul’s Drag Race – a show which I haven’t seen since the epic third season of Manila versus Raja. This year I was addicted, and the final four proved a competitive feast for the eyes, ears, and soul. While Symone was a well-deserving winner this past season, Rosé was consistently a powerhouse performer – a more-than-triple threat on all entertainment fields, and by the end it felt like she was so continuously excellent, even her great performances ran the danger of feeling underwhelming. I always hate when that happens – when a person of talent is regularly good at what they do that it reaches the point where it’s expected, and maintaining excellence is never appreciated as a more dramatic trajectory of those who starts from somewhere else. There’s a certain tragedy to that, but I’m certain Rosé will continue leaving a legacy in the drag world, and as such she gets this crown as Dazzler of the Day.

 
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Hearts of Tulips

We’ve only been dining with my parents outside and in their garage for the past year, but this Thursday will mark two weeks since my second COVID-19 vaccine, so soon that will change. At least, we’ll be able to exercise the option of joining them safely indoors as they’ve been vaccinated for a couple of months, and Andy finished his course a couple of weeks ago. Yesterday marked the last time we dined in the garage, as soon their backyard terrace canopy will go up, and we’ll be able to join them for dinner there, or inside if the weather decides to continue its erratic behavior. 

For this dinner, Mom made a delicious lasagna, and on the table was a simple but lovely bouquet of tulips and daffodils. It was a seasonal mark of celebration – quiet in its spicy scent, up close, and glorious in its colorful vibrancy. The tulips have lasted for several years – longer than the usual short-lived and sport-breaking trajectory of the average tulip bulb. 

After dinner we briefly toured the backyard and made plans for the upcoming season. Visions of Korean lilacs unfurled, and the hope of spring carried on the light wind. 

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Spring Grin & Pear It

These flowering pear trees – all flowers, no edible fruit – are in their brief glory this week. They’re so ubiquitous that we’re all sort of sick of them, and aside from this show they’re rather plain. Worse, their growth is such that their branches constantly break beneath the slightest winter snowfall. I’m not sure what constitutes their immense use in landscaping, other than some quick growth. Slow and steady always feels more rewarding to me, but that’s my own insufferable pathology. 

All of that sour critiquing aside, I’m taking this moment to celebrate their turn in the sun – and any turn in the sun for the matter, as it’s proving elusive and mysterious at a time when we need it the most. I’m ready for the full-fledged arrival of spring, longing for outside time that doesn’t bite with the wind or cut with the chill. 

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Dazzler of the Day: Lourdes Leon

It can’t be easy being Madonna’s daughter. As much as I love Madonna, one does get the feeling that living with her is no easy gig. Yet from most indications her first-born daughter, Lourdes Leon, is making her way from beneath the enormous shadow of the most famous mother in history. Ms. Leon earns her first Dazzler of the Day honor, thanks to her latest turn as the muse and model of Marc Jacobs, and a charming ‘Vanity Fair’ story that reveals a level of sophistication that one might expect from the offspring of Madonna. Watching her grow into her own may not be as rocky as some anticipated. 

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Recalled to Boston Life

Gearing up for a couple of Boston weekends in the not-too-distant future, our first trips in far too long, I’m doing my best to contain my excitement, as too many exciting plans have been dashed int he past year. Instead, I’m taking a contemplative look back at some previous visits, such as this one from April 2019, in which a relatively large contingent of some of my favorite family and friends descended upon the city for one spectacular weekend. My Mom and my niece Emi arrived first, and I had an early dinner with them, then Kira joined me at the Copley Fairmont, and we made our way to the condo where the Montross family was cozily ensconced on a rainy and windy night. It remains one of my favorite Boston weekends that somehow worked out perfectly. Bonus: Madonna had just released ‘Medellín adding to the magic and majesty of the moment. And soon, we shall begin a few new Boston chapters… 

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Dazzler of the Day: Victoria Beckham

If you were a Spice Girl, which Spice Girl would you be?

My answer is easy and obvious: Posh.

All the way. And not just because of David Beckham.

Marking her debut as Dazzler of the Day, Victoria Beckham earns the honor for her fashion line, and for staying somehow above the fray of celebrity downfalls and difficulties that too often plague former members of girl groups and boy bands. Ms. Beckham has turned her love for fashion into a viable career, punctuated by an elegant sense of timeless style married to a very modern angle. Sparse, severe, and chic to the east thread, Beckham surprised the fashion world with her consistent excellence. She hides behind that never-caught-smiling cool visage, but I sense a sly humor underneath it all. That in itself is a dazzling feat.

PS – David Beckham.

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A Narcissus Inspiration

The best designs are simple and based in the most rudimentary lessons of nature. Color combinations especially are taught to us in the way nature arranges its blooms and foliage. The golden throat of a bearded iris flanked by the purple majesty of its perfumed petals. The chartreuse leaves of the coral bark maple and the thrilling juxtaposition of its reddish stems. The striking magenta of the Lychnis tempered by the wooly gray green rosettes of foliage from which its fire rises. 

Such were the ideas of inspiration flitting across my mind when I was deciding which curtains to order for the patio canopy this summer. I decided to keep things simple, and chose a white and yellow palette like the ‘Ice Follies’ Narcissus seen blooming in the garden this week. 

The drabness of stormy days and the lingering threat of snow demanded something cheery and sunny. Last year I added accents of yellow to the patio in a table and a couple of plant stands, and no one got to see any of it. I’ve held onto them for another year, and they are quite striking when the sun echoes their glad glow. It’s sets a fun stage for outdoor visitors, and when a chill deigns to creep in at last light, these curtains can be drawn closed in a circle of intimacy and warmth. 

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Dazzler of the Day: Mel Odom

A Renaissance man in every sense of the term, Mel Odom is the embodiment of what a true Dazzler of the Day fully encompasses. With a storied career of artistic achievements, he continues creating new work and pushing his artistic evolution with every new project. His portraits include “world leaders, scoundrels, authors, friends and family” and chances are you’ve seen one of his pieces somewhere. (His Madonna portrait appeared in an epic Rolling Stone review of ‘Like A Prayer‘ – and Odom’s take on her revealed the ethereal, mysterious, and bewitching essence of that album, and of the woman herself.) 

His artwork has entranced the entire world, with regular appearances in Time, Rolling Stone, Blue Boy, Omni, the New York Times, and Playboy (where the eroticism of much of his work found happy fruition). Reminiscent of the style of Tamara de Lempicka, Odom’s artistic expression also reaches further back to the gods and goddesses of Greek and Roman mythology. While in less-sophisticated hands it might remove his subjects from grasp, Odom draws them closer to the viewer, presenting an intimacy in the eyes and the gaze, eliciting a sense of mystique in the very act of revelation. Even when the eyes of his subjects are closed, he somehow succeeds at revealing a bit of their soul. Illuminating that connection between beauty and humanity is where Mel Odom truly dazzles. 

{Visit his enchanting website here.}

(‘Charleston’ by Mel Odom.)

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The Korean Victorian Holiday House

Grandly ornamented and punctuated by its black and white paint scheme, the stately Victorian house on Locust Avenue served as the gathering place for a host of my most favored childhood memories. It was here where my family would religiously assemble for every Thanksgiving and Christmas Day, here where we would honor Suzie’s birthday each June ninth, and here where graduation parties and weddings would eventually take place. For my childhood, it was a place of magic and enchantment, carrying the familiarity of a home-away-from-home, but tinged with enough mystery and secrets to always be slightly out of reach. 

Behind the carriage house there were the rumored wanderings of a group of chickens. Further out along the forest’s edge was a stand of rhubarb, and beyond that a few stands of Jack-in-the-Pulpit, purportedly discarded from the front bed. The formal gardens had the carved out remnants of a little pool – a water feature that had long ago dried up and never been re-filled. The hot and dry days of summer made it inhospitable, but I loved imagining its former incarnation, and would lurk there beneath the drooping boughs of an evergreen, even when Suzie had long tired of being outside.

While there was nothing secret about the gardens, they held a mystique that has never dissolved, even all these years later when I re-examine them in my mind. There is always something more to be found around each curve, something in the shade of a grand elm, or beneath the gnarled maze of grape vines that threatened to engulf their arbor. It was a beauty and sublimity that carried on the mockorange-perfumed breezes of summer, or the sweet wafting of the otherwise inconspicuous fringe tree. The peony beds and their heavy flowerheads of fragrant majesty got all the credit, but I knew were quieter forces at work perfuming that wondrous air. 

All of these wonders were secondary and peripheral to the real magic and mystery of the grounds: the Ko house, and all its Victorian majesty. Like the central locale of ‘Meet Me In St. Louis’ years before I ever felt the pull of Judy Garland, the Ko home was the hub of so much of my social world. Clearly that wasn’t much since I was just a child, but to a child it was everything. 

Much of its Victorian charm had been preserved and left fully intact – there were stained-glass windows, red-velvet-embossed wallpaper, fireplaces both upstairs and down, and a warm-hued wood that ran throughout the house. With all the wood, and some dark carpeting, it should have felt dim and dark, but somehow it never did. Not in my childhood days. For all of its multi-storied, sprawling expanse, it felt intimate and cozy – a testament to the family that occupied it, as well as all the artful objects and unique items that populated the shelves and corners. 

Gnarled cacti and bizarre succulents stood rising out of buckets and ancient pottery. On the mantle of the dining room fireplace, glass jars of ginseng roots suspended in some preservation liquid stood sentry, their contorted forms a fascinating opportunity for anthropomorphic meanderings. Korean dolls, decked out in the most exquisitely colored dresses of silk paraded behind glass boxes perched above bookshelves. A round bay window, lined with a curved, cushioned banquette for rainy day reading sessions (which I never saw anyone occupy) marked one of my favorite spots in the house. It was in that room that Suzie and my brother and I spent the latter half of a dim evening – on the night we had to stay over because Dad was having eye surgery in Albany. No one would be home to watch us, so Mom packed us up for the Ko house, where we were largely left to Suzie’s entertaining expertise. As worried as we were about our own father, we felt safe in the dark expanse of that room, which would typically be fraught with shadow and menace on such a night. 

As the memory recedes, I try vainly to hold onto the warmth that came from the Ko home, and I still find it in Suzie and Elaine and the Ko boys. It wasn’t about a place or a space – it was about the good things that happened there. It’s different for me since I was mostly an onlooker and visitor – there for the happiest of celebratory days – and perhaps our childhoods give too much power to place and circumstance…

 

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