Monthly Archives:

February 2017

A Pancit Birthday Dinner for Mom

We left it in the hands of Mom as to what kind of birthday dinner she wanted, and she chose a traditional Filipino one of pancit and adobo. I made those dishes (the latter in a slow cooker, which I’m still not completely sold on as far as cooking adobo goes). Andy made the sensational lavender cake depicted here, and it was a fun evening that I won’t bog down with excessive verbiage. The photos tell most of the story. (Cheese board by Suzie Ko, so there’s no otherwise-likely litigation in the future.)

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The Power of Simplicity

This dish was one of the first I ever learned to make, way back in Andy’s kitchen in Guilderland circa 2000, and was one of the first dinners I ever cooked for him. It’s simple enough, and very forgiving, so I won’t waste time with exact measurements or ratios. It begins with a sweet onion, diced and cooked in some olive oil on medium heat to the point of translucency. To that, add some garlic and a can or two of tomatoes, diced or chopped however you like. Boil this for a bit, then add a serving of vodka, and let boil off a bit more. Add some cream and Parmigiano-Reggiano and a decent bunch of roughly-chopped fresh basil. That last piece is the most important part, lending it a pesto zing that sends it soaring. Serve with penne and you’re done.

Food is the way to the heart.

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Dedicated to the One I Love

The main problem with Valentine’s Day is that it tries to negate the love that should be present and celebrated throughout the year. To that end, here are a few photos of the guy that I love, seen through a number of years. Cute kids often grow into cute adults, and Andy was a very cute kid. I even like his questionable shag/stripe phase (not an easy look to pull off).

We found this treasure trove of photographs while cleaning up a few weeks ago, and though I don’t often enjoy looking back, I paused to peruse these gems. Seeing your husband as a little kid is a heartwarming thing.

I’m not sure how he’ll take to his (much) younger self being paraded on this salacious blog, but the perennial rule of marriage is that it’s easier to ask forgiveness than to ask permission. Besides, what’s not to love here?

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Music for the Broken-Hearted

Truth be told, I’ve never particularly minded nor celebrated Valentine’s Day. I’ve enjoyed the artifice of it all – the red and pink and flowery doily aspects – but the day itself, coming as it does in the heart of winter, didn’t change my life in any way. For some, though, this day can be harsh and unpleasant – a reminder of love when maybe all they really want to do is forget about such madness. This collection of links is for those sensible folks (and for anyone who loves Madonna).

Love is a bird, she needs to fly. Let all the hurt inside of you die.

Yet you never do anything to make me want to stay.

You need so much but not from me, turn your back in my hour of need.

I won’t recall the names and places of each sad occasion, but that’s no consolation here and now.

Deep in my heart I’m concealing things that I’m longing to say…

Your heart is not open so I must go. The spell has been broken, I loved you so.

In my heart, I know we’ve come apart, and I don’t know where to start.

Don’t explain yourself cause talk is cheap.

Don’t play with something you should cherish for life.

Somehow I destroyed the perfect dream.

I’ve been on that ledge before, you can’t hide yourself from me.

When I let loose the need to know, then we’re both free, free to go.

Hold me in your arms until there’s nothing left.

It can’t be fun to always be the chosen one.

You took my love for granted, why, oh why – the show is over say good-bye.

If this is the end then let it come.

I’ll cast a spell that you can’t undo ‘til you wake up and you find that you love me too.

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A Simple Valentine Song

I DON’T KNOW WHAT IT IS THAT MAKES ME LOVE YOU SO

I ONLY KNOW I NEVER WANT TO LET YOU GO

‘CAUSE YOU STARTED SOMETHING, CAN’T YOU SEE

THAT EVER SINCE WE MET YOU’VE HAD A HOLD ON ME

I HAPPENS TO BE TRUE, I ONLY WANT TO BE WITH YOU

This year we’re going for something simple and less cynical than previous Valentine’s Days. In the past, I’ve featured a poem or two (usually Dorothy Parker), and a couple of years ago I did a pair of posts that were both slightly ironic and tongue-in-cheek. Last year I tried to get more serious, with this one and that one. This time around, I’m offering a more straightforward V-Day dedication, of a cheesy love song sung in earnest, a bird that seems to grow rarer as the years pass. I believe that we need a little more love right now – and this is a song that always makes me smile and want to dance.

IT DOESN’T MATTER WHERE YOU GO OR WHAT YOU DO

I WANT TO SPEND EACH MOMENT OF THE DAY WITH YOU

LOOK WHAT HAS HAPPENED WITH JUST ONE KISS

I NEVER KNEW THAT I COULD BE IN LOVE LIKE THIS

IT’S CRAZY BUT IT’S TRUE, I ONLY WANT TO BE WITH YOU

 

YOU STOPPED AND SMILED AT ME

ASKED ME IF I’D CARE TO DANCE

I FELL INTO YOUR OPEN ARMS

I DIDN’T STAND A CHANCE

 

NOW, LISTEN, HONEY, I JUST WANT TO BE BESIDE YOU EVERYWHERE

AS LONG AS WE’RE TOGETHER, HONEY, I DON’T CARE

‘CAUSE YOU STARTED SOMETHING, CAN’T YOU SEE

THAT EVER SINCE WE MET YOU’VE HAD A HOLD ON ME

NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO, I ONLY WANT TO BE WITH YOU

(And for that extras helping of cheese-Louise, check out the Bay City Rollers doing their hair-tastic version below. It’s a hoot.)

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Andy Cohen’s ‘Superficial’

There’s a certain art to the act of seeming superficial, and Andy Cohen masters that art while delving deeper into another diary of a year in show business. The latest (last?) edition of the Andy Cohen Diaries, ‘Superficial’ takes up pretty much right where Cohen’s first diary left off, and continues in much the same vein. The core cast of characters in his NYC family is gloriously intact – a loyal bunch including Anderson Cooper, Sarah Jessica Parker, Kelly Ripa, John Hickey, long-time pal Grac and a possible love interest endearingly emblazoned as #BAS (BrazilianAndySamburg) – and their antics brings the city alive, making it seem both boundlessly exciting yet intimately quaint.

While there’s no real need for extra comic relief in this light but enjoyable read, his parents offer their bit, including MY FAVORITE PART OF EVERY BOOK HE’S EVER WRITTEN: his mother. She offers her own hilarious insight into her son, the funniest of which seems to be ENTIRELY UNINTENTIONAL. Such interactions ground Cohen even as he’s casually texting with Madonna or sniffing up on Dolly Parton’s decolletage.

His one almost-constant companion remains his beloved dog Wacha, who’s undergoing some soul-searching too, to find out what is at the root of his behavioral quirks. It’s a bit of a theme, as Cohen’s diary becomes its own form of therapy. His new apartment is under construction, and his personal life seems ready for improvements too. To that end, we see his restless FOMO syndrome finding some sense of reconciliation as the book concludes. Keeping a diary is hectic business, and, much like our social media output, sometimes it seems to supercede the actual inhabiting of the moment. Cohen becomes more and more aware of this as the book progresses, and though the reader is never given a dull moment, one gets the feeling that he’s already eyeing the next thing. The saddest passages of the book are those moments when Cohen realizes he’s not quite connecting with someone – whether it’s a guest or the audience, a stranger on the street, or even the possibility of a romantic relationship. It’s a striking contrast to see someone still searching for more when they have such an otherwise-enviable existence. While on its surface everything is all glitz and glamour, fame and hard-earned fortune, Cohen delves a little deeper as he reaches the last pages, positing the possibility that his three-year docu-odyssey has come to its close, and that maybe there is more to the unexamined life after all.

On the last page is a message that could be read several ways, and Cohen’s occasional gift for multi-layered meaning comes into beautiful focus: “In this year, as I’ve been going back through what I’ve written to make it ready for publication, I’ve been forced to think a lot about where I am in my life. That ability to reflect does not come naturally to me. I’m usually too busy having fun! But what hasn’t been great about writing the diary is the feeling sometimes at the end of a busy day that there’s still one more thing to do.”

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A Super Snowy Recap

Who knows whether the snow will have stopped falling by the time this post goes up and I have to ride into work. My office doesn’t close for snow. Never has and never will. [Sigh.] On with the recap, because on Monday mornings like this one, all I want to do is rewind. Just to Friday…

It all began with a bang: Zac Efron in a Speedo.

Not quite hiding my family jewels.

A Queen fails to live up to her name.

Sneak Cheesecake peek.

Color me excited!

My ass got the glorious Cheesecake treatment here.

Art for inspiration.

Blank me.

Winter poem.

Hot hunk Saturday.

Cold snow Sunday.

Hunks of the Day included Matt Lister, Dev Patel, Marcus Balliette, James Gao, Paul Richmond, Spencer Rahal & Arad Winwin.

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On Sunday It Snows

The Suite for Flute & Jazz Piano Trio Jean as performed by Pierre Rampal & Claude Bolling (and written by Bolling himself) plays on the stereo. The living room is flooded with white light – from the snow, not the sun – and through the green branches of a Norfolk Island Pine I watch it fall down, heavier and heavier.

On the stove, a batch of Sausage, Kale and Potato soup is simmering. This one uses the chorizo sausage called for in the original recipe, and already that has made a difference. Not that that first attempt wasn’t good – I just wanted to see how it was meant to be. The chorizo rendered so much more delicious fat too – the lovely paprika-hued kind that soaked so gorgeously into the pale potatoes and translucent onions. Once again I was struck by how a simple tablespoon of Balsamic vinegar can have a profound effect on a pot of soup.

The music plays on, and more snow falls down. I move onto the conversation couch, and open up the Harry Potter play – billed as the 8th story, told nineteen years later. In one sitting, I devoured the first half. (You can too – it’s very much a traditional play, and moves as quickly on the page.) Harry Potter, a snowstorm, and soup simmering in the kitchen. Hello to a perfect Sunday.
And still, the snow falls.

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A Winter Poem

THE SNOW-STORM
By Ralph Waldo Emerson
Announced by all the trumpets of the sky,
Arrives the snow, and, driving o’er the fields,
Seems nowhere to alight: the whited air
Hides hills and woods, the river, and the heaven,
And veils the farm-house at the garden’s end.
The sled and traveller stopped, the courier’s feet
Delayed, all friends shut out, the housemates sit
Around the radiant fireplace, enclosed
In a tumultuous privacy of storm.
Come see the north wind’s masonry.
Out of an unseen quarry evermore
Furnished with tile, the fierce artificer
Curves his white bastions with projected roof
Round every windward stake, or tree, or door.
Speeding, the myriad-handed, his wild work
So fanciful, so savage, nought cares he
For number or proportion. Mockingly,
On coop or kennel he hangs Parian wreaths;
A swan-like form invests the hidden thorn;
Fills up the farmer’s lane from wall to wall,
Maugre the farmer’s sighs; and, at the gate,
A tapering turret overtops the work.
And when his hours are numbered, and the world
Is all his own, retiring, as he were not,
Leaves, when the sun appears, astonished Art
To mimic in slow structures, stone by stone,
Built in an age, the mad wind’s night-work,
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A Blank Post

A non-traditional post, minus a picture, and I’m sorry for that.

It’s just that this is always a difficult time of the year when you live in the Northeast.

This is what makes the spring and summer so luscious.

But as you’re going through it, it simply sucks.

Hence the lack of motivation to come up with anything all that profound or original.

I will get up in the morning and try to do a bang-up mid-day post.

In the meantime, grab a book. Find a spot by the window.

Wrap yourself in your coziest robe.

Put some tea on the stove.

Grab your loved ones a little closer.

It’s winter.

This is survival.

Let’s get through it together.

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Art For Inspiration

In anticipation of his upcoming coloring book release, artist Paul Richmond has been featured here quite a bit over the past couple of days (and we have one more extra-special Richmond post up later today). Artists, much more than sports figures and politicians, have always been my heroes. They are the ones I look up to, the ones that inspire me, and the ones that, far too often, go unheralded for changing the world. A work of art has the power to transform lives and alter the trajectory of the universe. It’s not always apparent, and it usually happens on a smaller level and scale than most events that people think of as shaping the world, but though the plane may seem smaller, it’s actually more pervasive and powerful than many of us realize.

When I was younger, I looked for people like me in places like xy magazine. I also looked for recognition in the works of Herb Ritts and Keith Haring, gay artists who celebrated the male figure. As I grew older, I found solace and reassurance in the images of Paul Richmond, Steve Walker, Joe Phillips, and Michael Breyette. Their work showed two men in love, in friendship, in lust, and in companionship. That art was vital in getting me to see myself as worthy of love, and realizing that my love was as true and moving as anyone else’s love.

That’s why art will always matter.

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Cake Through A Keyhole

Color my ass any way you want to – this is a cheeky promotional item for Paul Richmond’s ‘Cheesecake Boys: An Adult Coloring Book’. You can download the original HQ version here on his website, then print it out and go to town with markers, crayons, colored pencils, lipstick or mascara – the sky’s the limit! If you post the finished work on Instagram and tag @paulyworld and @alanilagan, he (and I) will be especially honored – and he may just add it to his wall of fame.

I was super lucky to have been immortalized by Mr. Richmond once before, so this is just the icing on the cheesecake. He’s been posting a series of these in support of his upcoming book release, and I’m now in the amazing company of heroes such as Matthew Rettenmund, Garrett Miller, and CardreaderB.

For obvious reasons, this is probably my favorite, and it’s amazing to see how he incorporates little details – a bottle of cologne, a glass of water, a recent Instagram pic as the framed wall art – into telling touches that immediately give away the eyes of an artist.

A couple of variations on how some have chosen to shade my ass are posted below – many thanks to Jan-Simon Minima, Richard Knoppen, Guinevere Renée, Susan Figueiredo Reaves, Berdien Geven-Dölle & Erik Dalston for filling me in so gorgeously!

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Color Me Excited

Lending a distinctly cheeky edge to the adult coloring craze currently sweeping the world, Paul Richmond is offering a collection of drawings just waiting to be filled in and shaded by anyone who has a passion for cute guys and art. Richmond has been an artist I’ve admired for many years (not just because of his gracious rendering of me as a Cheesecake Boy), and his current coloring endeavor has been a smash on his Instagram feed. Taking that one step further, he will be releasing an entire book of drawings that capitalize on our obsessions with coloring and Cheesecake Boys (available from Dreamspinner Press on February 14).

There is something both joyous and calming about coloring. For many of us, it harkens back to a time of innocence and happiness, when the soothing act of creation found inspiration in a box of colorful crayons. That such a fond childhood memory is only now coming back into vogue seems strange – but Richmond has been a master of combining vintage notions (such as pinup girls) and giving them a modern spin (such as pinup guys). His cheeky series of Cheesecake Boys and their requisite wardrobe malfunctions is the perfect choice for a coloring book that demands a bit of interaction from the viewer.

I’ve often felt that inside most of us is an artist yearning to be released. Richmond’s latest creative explosion lays the structure and groundwork to foster such creativity, and there’s something vastly rewarding of being able to take an active part in his artistic process. It is the ultimate compliment to the viewer – to invite them to be part of that artistic journey, to hand us the power to complete something that he began. There’s a trust there, and a generosity that makes his work a little more special.

His series of “Friday Freebies” has garnered an impressive following, and artists of all levels are invited to show off their colorful contributions, instilling a greater sense of community and camaraderie at a time when we need that more than ever. Richmond gets just as much of a kick out of seeing the finished works as we do in participating, graciously posting them on his Instagram page and genuinely enjoying what different people decide to do with his lines.

His new adult coloring book unleashes a new set of Cheesecake Boys upon the world, and it’s coming at just the right time. The impeccably-timed Valentine’s Day release makes it the perfect gift for a loved one, a friend, or, perhaps best of all, your own self. For anyone who’s wanted to color their dreams, Paul Richmond just gave you that chance.

{“Cheesecake Boys: An Adult Coloring Book” will be available on February 14, 2017 from Dreamspinner Press. Paul Richmond’s other work can be found on his website: www.paulrichmondstudio.com.  Richmond is also on FaceBook under ‘Paul Richmond Studio’ and on Instagram under “paulyworld”}

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Sneak Cheesecake Peek

Not all heroes are nice in real life. You know Batman is a seriously conflicted bitch, and Superman is so anal he probably poops diamonds, but every once in a while a hero reveals him or herself to be just as cool as you want them to be. Artist Paul Richmond is one such hero for me. For his entire career, he’s maintained a positive outlook on art and its place in the world, celebrating other artists (such as one of his greatest muses, Dolly Parton) and sharing his own work in wildly creative fashion. Even his powerful marriage-equality efforts were tinged with wit and whimsy – a lesson in how to deliver a potent message with charm and enchantment. Perhaps even more effective was the simple example he was living out as a proud gay man. It’s something we might take for granted now, but it wasn’t always so, and sometimes I think the world wants us to step back and be silent again. Richmond’s work is in beautifully brash and bold defiance of this. He welcomes all into his colorful world of art, where individuality and creative expression find happy fruition.

His work, his indefatigable spirit, and the man himself have always managed to make me feel a little bit better about being different. His work props people up when they’re feeling down or lonely, and he celebrates the diversity and strength in those who dare to tread off the beaten path. He revels in the flamboyant and outlandish, and that larger-than-life and grander-in-spirit personality is an inspiration. The best part is that he’s one of those artists who believes in sharing and cultivating an active interaction with his audience.

Lately, he’s been posting a drawing online every Friday – dubbed Friday Freebies – where you can download one of his drawings and color it in as you see fit. The only limits on how you do it are up to you – crayons, markers, pencils, lipstick – anything and everything goes, and he invites you to share your work with others. It becomes a community dialogue – a friendly, fun, engaging, and welcoming dialogue, wholly at odds with the darkness of the present state of affairs. That may be Richmond’s greatest gift to us. Tomorrow, I’m doing a little post celebrating the release of his first adult coloring book – come back and see all the awesomeness he’s getting up to now.

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The Madonna Timeline: Song #135~ ‘Queen’

{Note: The Madonna Timeline is an ongoing feature, where I put the iPod on shuffle, and write a little anecdote on whatever was going on in my life when that Madonna song was released and/or came to prominence in my mind.}

It will never rain, never rain

If the great sky falls down, no rain, no more rain

Blood’s pouring down, high alert, we watch it burn

It’s a world undeceived, sirens, sirens

Everyone’s whispering, the CIA, MI6

Hire the unknown

We’re at the end of days

For heaven’s sake 

The queen’s been slain

She’ll never rule again

The queen’s been slain

She’ll never rule again

Your queen’s been slain

Queen’s been slain

This lackluster Madonna Timeline entry was one of the’ Rebel Heart’ bonus tracks, and it probably should have been left off that hodge-podge too as it is a dirge-like bummer of a song. I suppose it holds a certain power and grace, offering a hint of royalty and a time of manners and honor and respect long gone. It was also reportedly written in honor of Princess Diana, which is neither here nor there.

I don’t much care for it, and that’s ok. The bridge is trying at best, echoing another sub-par work ‘Hey You’ (which is about as exciting as its title suggests). The rest is all gloom and doom, and we’ve had enough of that for the moment. Let’s fast-forward this – it’s one big meh…

Who will take her place?

It’s written on everyone’s face

The truth is slowly dawning

I hear tomorrow calling

Some things can’t be replaced

The realization of a new generation

On the eve of imitation

All gone, overthrown

May God bless you all.

SONG #135 – ‘Queen’

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