Monthly Archives:

August 2016

A Grandly Gratuitous Ryan Lochte Relay

Ryan Lochte has been one of those charismatic, charming, and goofy Hunks who is always good for a ridiculous sound-bite or swaggering Speedo pose, but let’s not forget that he’s also a champion Olympian, where he’s played an integral role in gaining the US several relay medals. More important to those of you who come here for the guy candy, he has no problem preening and posing in all sorts of body-baring swim attire. He’s been named a Hunk of the Day, and his Speedo has graced these pages time and time again. Here’s one more.

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Olympic Swimmer Spotlight: Chad Le Clos

One of the most thrilling rivalries of these Summer Olympics is that between Michael Phelps and this guy, Chad Le Clos. They’ve volleyed wins back and forth over the years, and meet up again tonight. Phelps has been featured here before (naked, no less), so this post belongs entirely to Le Clos. Let’s see who can pull it off on a night when speed is Queen

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Olympic Swimmer Spotlight: Marcelo Chierighini

Representing host country Brazil, this is swimmer Marcelo Chierighini, making his first splash in these parts, and resplendent in smiles. A pity the swimmers have to shave their entire bodies for maximum speed, but in between competition, Mr. Chierighini managed to retain a small patch of fur. Hey, sometimes that water can be cold.

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Famous Nude Guys

In the aftermath of Orlando Bloom’s more-than-just-a-dick-slip photos, it seems fitting to pause for further reflection and reminiscing over those male celebrities who have bared their assets for all the world to see. Male nudity is the final frontier, it seems, for prurient America, and in this wretched election year let’s turn our attention to the staffs at hand.

A is for Austin Armacost, who has graced these pages with his boffo bod, ever-improving over the years. These latest shots prove that Armacost has focused on his very best parts, and shown them off to their greatest potential.

B is for Bloom, as in Orlando, who started this resurgence of male nudity with this collection of racy fully-nude photos. It also stands for Bieber – Justin Bieber – who continued the streak, quite literally.

C is for Chris Salvatore, whose musical prowess is as magical as his disrobing.

D is for the delicious David Gandy, eye-&-man-candy, and deliriously-sexy Dan Osborne.

E is for Epke Zonderland, one of the very first naked Olympians we ever featured on this site, back in the Summer Olympics of 2012.

F is for Fusco, as in one of our most popular Hunks of all-time, Philip Fusco, who has been charming our pants off by taking his pants off for years.

G is for gingers, like Greg Rutherford – and the red carpet matched the red drapes.

We’re just going to skep ahead to Z, because it’s summer, I’m tired, and there’s more than enough naked male celebrities for you to fawn over until tomorrow.

Z is for Zac Efron, who went bottoms-up in this memorable post, and has teased us tantalizingly ever since.

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Olympic Spotlight: Men’s Gymnastics

Here are arguably the best bodies in the Rio Olympics: built, intense, muscle-bound vehicles designed to defy gravity and perform miraculous physical feats that the rest of us mere mortals can only marvel at. This is the US Men’s Gymnastics team, competing for the gold. Like this dynamic duo, these gymnasts have each been a Hunk of the Day solo-style, but this is a special group scene for this week’s festivities… I mean, competition.

If you want to see their solo shows, check out their featured Hunk posts:

Alex Naddour

Jake Dalton

John Orozco

Chris Brooks

Sam Mikulak

Danell Leyva

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Sexiest Olympic Team?

A veteran and a virgin, clad only in Speedos, match their movements and their moments in thrilling precision. This is the American Diving Team of David Boudia and Steele Johnson. Each gentleman has been named a Hunk of the Day here on their own merit, but this post is to celebrate their accomplishments as a team. The training and trust they have put into making it all the way to the Olympics goes beyond any team-building exercise I’ve ever known.  Congrats on their great accomplishments.

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Olympic Swimmer Profile: Adam Peaty

The cute British swimmer with the to-die-for accent, this is newly-minted gold medalist Adam Peaty, who just sped to his golden destiny in the 100m breaststroke, in which he also broke the world record. Congrats to Mr. Peaty on this amazing accomplishment at the Rio Olympics. The closest I’ve gotten to this sort of thing is the pair of gold Pumas I just bought on clearance.

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The Oiled-Up Recap of 8/8/16

The day and the month add up to the year, and this post adds up to the week that came before. Summer still smolders, and I’m still not even close to ready for it to end. Enough about that, let’s go back… the only way to do summer right: stall, stall, and stall some more.

Last Friday marked the beginning of the Summer Olympics in Rio, and it looks to be the usual hunk-filled parade of oiled-up beauty and brawn, beginning with this shirtless guy who all but stole the opening ceremony: Pita Taufatofua.

It was a banner week of male nudity – and I’m talking full-frontal male nudes, thanks to a naked Orlando Bloom and an equally-naked Justin Bieber. Not to be outdone, John Cena got nude too.

The bodacious butt of Tyler Hoechlin.

Nick Jonas put on a wet underwear show.

The attic is back, baby, and better than ever. This may be where I spend my fall.

A multifaceted host makes the Hunk of the Day: Osher Ginsberg.

The proper garnish makes all the difference.

Losing my Speedo is better than losing my religion. Losing my pants is simply common-place.

Spring Thaw Salvation, for the Delusional Grandeur Tour, because the dream goes on.

Summer must continue, because Tom Ford just gave us the perfect fragrance for it.

A fencer, a ginger, and a male model, all in one: Race Imboden.

More Hunks: Hugo Parisi, Rogan O’Connor, Ning Zetao, & Jimmy Feigen.

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Olympic Fencer Spotlight: Race Imboden

There are so many possible Hunks of the Day coming at us (there’s a double one coming up this evening) that I’m forced to open another outlet to feature the stars of this summer’s Olympic Games. The first to be so honored is a veritable triple threat: Race Imboden. He’s a fencer, a ginger, and a male model. Ding, ding, ding – jackpot! I know several folks who would be happy to get poked by his sword. En guard indeed.

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Tom Ford’s Soleil Blanc

White hot.

Bright sun.

Summer sizzle.

Leave it to Tom Ford to sneak into the summer fragrance scene with a classic echo of coconut and suntan lotion in refined and elegant form. Soleil Blanc is his take on a white powder beach, and it’s absolutely radiant.

The latest offering from the decadent Private Blend line is a scorcher that subliminally smolders instead of burning intensely. While his Portofino collection keeps things cool and crisp with its citrus heart, Soleil Blanc is a sizzler of a different sort. Coconut imbues the proceedings, but there’s a slight sliver of smokiness to this as well, because summer ripens into such a thing at its apex and again at its end. The most fleeting wisp of musk grounds the proceedings, but it’s barely noticeable. Bergamot keeps everything tidy, and the tinge of amber lends it a warmth that mirrors the hot days.

So many of Ford’s Private Blend line can read dirty ~ in the best and most interesting way ~ but this is one of the cleaner scents. There’s still an edge to it, but this one can go on summer mornings or summer nights and be equally compelling at both ends of the light.

Longevity is a few hours, typical of many summer frags but slightly disappointing in a Private Blend that holds its price-point so high. Still, worth a reapplication and a spin along the shore if you need an extra jolt this season.

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Shadows & Obscurity

Unseen, across the landscape of light, a morning approaches. Unbidden, because there are certain nights you don’t want to end, it presents itself matter-of-factly. There it stands in front of you: the day. Unpretentious, indisputable, and always just a little inscrutable, it awaits further instruction. Which way will you go? Where will you take it? How would you like it to end?

Obscured by the changing lens of life, it looks a little different to everyone. Distorted by the stories we tell ourselves, and the tales we choose to hear, it bends and refracts and ricochets like light. Yet as tricky as it sometimes seems to be, there is something reassuring about the whole scene: a tacit understanding with the day that we will do it together.

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The DG Tour: Spring Thaw Salvation ~ Part 5

WHO ISN’T AN ORDINARY PERSON?

HOW HORRIBLY PRESUMPTUOUS

TO WANT TO BE ANYTHING ELSE.

BUT I HAVE TO TELL YOU.

I’VE BEEN TREATED AS SOMETHING SPECIAL

FOR SO LONG, AND I’VE TRIED MY HARDEST

TO BE SOMETHING SPECIAL BUT I’M NOT,

I’M NOT EXCEPTIONAL, I’M SMART ENOUGH,

BUT I’M NOT BRILLIANT AND I’M NOT SPIRITUAL

OR EVEN ALL THAT FOCUSED.

I THINK I CAN STAND THAT,

BUT I’M NOT SURE IF THE PEOPLE AROUND ME CAN.

– MICHAEL CUNNINGHAM

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The DG Tour: Spring Thaw Salvation ~ Part 4

If you remember where this all began, you’ll find that we have returned to that moment and come full circle. In the beginning was the idea. We have now arrived at the execution. The curtain is going down… or coming up. This is The Delusional Grandeur Tour, and the Rock Star is about to take the stage.

FINALE:

The moments leading up to the performance are both mundane and electric. A school-age Madonna waits in the wings of the stage, her heart starting to pound in her chest, beneath her robe and through her costume, skimpy as it was. She ran through the routine in her mind again, then eyed the black-light she’d set up at the edge of the stage. It was designed to illuminate the day-glo body paint she’d applied to her body, just like she’d seen Goldie Hawn recently execute on television. She would stand there, naked for all intents and purposes, but for body paint and attitude and a few barely-seen pieces of underwear, and she would dance and writhe with gleeful abandon – a virgin foreshadowing of virgin activities to come. She would shock everyone who watched, and be the one they all talked about for weeks to come. She couldn’t explain why it needed to be done. She simply did it. For life. For love. For inspiration.

This would be her greatest show.

This would be her finest moment.

This would be the time when she showed her classmates, her friends and her family who she was.

She would show the world.

The lights go down.

The crowd falls silent.

The music begins…

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The DG Tour: Spring Thaw Salvation ~ Part 3

LOVE IS PAIN

AND

PAIN IS ART!

SHOW ME

YOUR

GRAFFITI HEART!!!

~ Madonna

IF GRAFFITI ON THE WALL CHANGED ANYTHING AT ALL

THEN IT WOULD BE ILLEGAL

IF SCARS COULD GO AWAY

WHAT WOULD YOUR BODY SAY

DON’T EVER HIDE YOUR FEELINGS

A crack in the visage,

like a fissure in an oil painting,

runs haphazardly along the random veining of a heart.

Bits of color peel away, fluttering to the floor

like snow or soap bubbles

or flecks of dried blood.

The artist bleeds like that:

clean and dirty and to-the-death.

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This Shirtless Tonga Guy Just Won The Olympics

It happened kind of early, but maybe that means we don’t have to be subjected to NBC’s wretched butchering of these summer Olympic Games. Pita Taufatofua already won the whole thing with his shirtless entrance into the games, as seen below. Representing Tonga for taekwando, he bears the flag and the suit of some hot loins. His greased-up, oiled-up, slicked-up torso also won him the otherwise-ridiculous admiration of all the commentators. I think Matt Lauer was even drooling. It’s going to be tough to beat this moment, but I’m hopeful Tom Daley will try.

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