October 2012
This is one of the funniest pictures I’ve taken in a long time, all for personal reasons. Here’s the quick back story: we were in Ogunquit for Columbus Day weekend. After dinner, we stopped at a toy store to look for gifts for my niece and nephew. Earlier that evening I had tried rabbit for the first time, which went against everything Andy believed in, as far as not eating furry and cuddly creatures goes, so he is holding up a rabbit and pretending that it’s pissed at me or in the last throes of death – I can’t tell which – while my mother is blowing her nose at the cash register. The big-ass lime-green umbrella sets off the scene nicely, and that freakish baby looking over Andy’s head adds just the right amount of disturbing dementedness to the composition. Who needs children with these two in my life?
Every trip to Ogunquit requires a stop at the Spoiled Rotten. It’s actually an entire enchanted world unto itself. Stepping into its sweetly-scented environs is like entering a magical land of whimsical treats, beautiful home items, and delights for all five senses. Around every corner is a new surprise waiting to amuse and charm, to tease the nose and tempt the tongue.
From the gorgeously decked-out front porch to the furthest corner of the upper floor, there are stunning objects stacked from floor to ceiling, and one could feasibly spend hours in each of the rooms, perusing and examining all of the wonders at hand. The owners are just as inviting as their wares, and even more animated and entertaining. One of them, Toby, was even working on his birthday.
That love and dedication comes through – even if the goods weren’t this exquisitely gorgeous.
It invariably happens, without planning or preparation, that I find myself alone on the Marginal Way before any Ogunquit vacation is over. Usually it comes toward the tail end of the trip – the night before we depart, or the very morning of departure. This time it was the day before when I took a bundled-up stroll during the wild, windy, wave-crushing window of high tide coming in.
Sometimes you have to walk a little way all by yourself. As one who has always cherished his solitude, I embraced this moment, even shedding a few unexpected tears as I passed the ocean spot where Gram’s ashes were scattered – brought on by a combination of the biting wind, the sheer stark beauty of the place, and the memories that Fall conjures.
As much as I love the spring, fall in New England carries its own inimitable mysticism, and a cozy enchantment all its own. As with most things, it is the preparatory anticipation that I love best ~ in this case the hunkering down for the impending winter. The dusk of the year is falling, and in the chill of the air, there is a frisson of excitement. Prepare the way.
Liberty Ridge Farm recently turned down a same-sex couple who wanted to have a wedding at their venue. In a story reported at Kristi’s On the Edge blog and on WNYT, the owners of Liberty Ridge Farm politely turned down not just one gay wedding, but a total of three gay weddings, at their site in the past year.
If it is indeed a private establishment, does Liberty Ridge have the right to refuse service to someone? Absolutely.
Do I have the right to object to that decision and recommend a boycott? Absolutely.
That’s the beauty of the liberty that this country is founded upon. Unfortunately for Liberty Farms, it’s just bad business. It’s also hypocritical, as I have no doubt that at least a few of the folks who have been married there had been divorced previously, so if you’re going to espouse religious beliefs, at least be consistent about it. Picking and choosing is where the bigotry and discrimination come into play.
It’s upsetting to think that there are businesses that still refuse service to certain people based on their sexual identity. That is no different than denying service to someone based on their race, gender, religion, or other aspect. And if being gay is a choice, where does that leave religion? Surely that is more of a choice than being gay. What if a company were to deny service to someone because they were Mormon or Jewish or Catholic? Would you support a business like that, no matter how much you liked what they were offering? Would you support a business that turned customers away or refused service because they were black? Personally, I can’t, and I won’t.
What may be most insidious about this whole thing is that all reports indicate that the owners of Liberty Farm Ridge denied this couple their wedding in the most polite and nice way, even apologizing to the two young women that they couldn’t accommodate them. As if that excuses homophobia. As if it’s okay to say, “I hate gay people and don’t believe they deserve the same rights as me,” so long as you do it with a smile and an apology.
Well I’m sorry too. Sorry that Liberty Ridge Farm is such a homophobic establishment that they chose to turn down at least three loving couples who wanted only to get married in a beautiful place. Sorry that though they may have the right to deny the use of their land to anyone, they chose to do so based on someone’s sexual identity. Sorry that I refuse to just accept it and pretend it’s not a homophobic act. And sorry that thanks to the news of social media (and their own website, FaceBook page, and Twitter account), people know exactly what sort of hateful, homophobic practices go down at Liberty Ridge Farm, and how to get in touch with them. Most of all, I’m sorry that while I am sincerely asking any and all of those who decide to reach out to them to be polite and respectful (and doing so with a smile on my face), some simply won’t listen.  (Super sorry about that last one.)
On Columbus Day, the crowd departs, and I’m reminded of the low-key scenes of our first few visits here a dozen years ago. One some of those nights it was tough to find a cup of coffee after a certain time – a far cry from today, when most businesses stay open until November at least – if not beyond. Personally, I like it when it gets quieter like this – when the noise and excitement subsides. It’s at odds with what a lot of people think of me, but when you get down to the nitty-gritty, the undressed core, I abhor pomp and circumstance. This is not something that translates well to a website, or print for that matter – and it is one of the conundrums of all that I’ve done – and all that I continue to do. Yet it is a delicious juxtaposition – such contrast and contradiction are what keep life from becoming too unbearably boring. The quest for survival is sometimes as simple as a fight against stagnation. Tonight – and this extra-long weekend in Ogunquit – we have won the battle. The war, however, rages on.
A number of the hunks featured on this site are those who are requested by other people, or recommended by whatever is going on in pop culture – not necessarily those men I personally find attractive (unless we’re talking Ben Cohen or David Beckham). Casper Van Dien is one of those who may join that vaunted pantheon of sex appeal, and not just because he’s bound and gagged (though that definitely doesn’t hurt).
 He reminds me vaguely of a younger version of Andy (though at that age Andy had the requisite policeman’s pornstache – someday I’ll dig out a photo of that). So I guess if I had to pick a type of guy I liked, this would be one of the prototypes. There was, and remains, much ado about Mr. Van Dien’s nude scene in ‘Starship Troopers’ – a movie I couldn’t bring myself to watch, but I’ll seek out those screen shots another day (a daily Hunk of the Day feature is going to require some thoughtful spacing-out of our chosen gentlemen).  He also went naked but for a loin cloth in a ‘Tarzan’ remake, another movie I missed. Sometimes it’s best to wait for the naughty excerpts and forego the hefty price of a movie ticket.
